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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:41,583 --> 00:00:43,584 (♪♪♪) 2 00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:26,502 GWEN: Dear Santa, are you real? 3 00:01:26,670 --> 00:01:28,588 If you live at the North Pole, 4 00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:32,341 how come I can't see your house when I look on Google Earth? 5 00:01:33,469 --> 00:01:35,511 Are you Saint Nicholas? 6 00:01:35,679 --> 00:01:38,139 Because you'd be incredibly old. 7 00:01:38,307 --> 00:01:40,808 How do you have time to read all the letters 8 00:01:40,976 --> 00:01:42,977 from all the children in the world? 9 00:01:43,145 --> 00:01:47,565 And how many cookies and mince pies have you eaten in all of history? 10 00:01:47,733 --> 00:01:50,902 How do you get all the presents in the sack? 11 00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:53,404 Does your sack have to get bigger every year 12 00:01:53,572 --> 00:01:56,407 because of exponential population growth? 13 00:01:56,575 --> 00:01:58,826 And how do you get down the chimneys? 14 00:01:58,994 --> 00:02:01,496 I put my head in ours and it's really small. 15 00:02:01,663 --> 00:02:04,081 Even if you could squeeze down it in one minute, 16 00:02:04,249 --> 00:02:07,335 there's nine houses in my road so that's nearly 10 minutes. 17 00:02:07,503 --> 00:02:10,046 And there are millions of roads in the world. 18 00:02:10,214 --> 00:02:13,800 It must be so hard being Santa these days. 19 00:02:14,218 --> 00:02:18,137 I mean, what if after all of that, I'm staying at Grandma's? 20 00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:23,351 Santa, how can you get round the whole world in just one night? 21 00:02:23,519 --> 00:02:24,477 My friend said 22 00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:26,437 that you'd have to go so fast, 23 00:02:26,605 --> 00:02:31,400 it would make you and the sleigh and the reindeer all burn up. 24 00:02:31,568 --> 00:02:35,530 I think you are real. But how do you do it? 25 00:02:35,697 --> 00:02:40,576 For Christmas I would love a pink Twinkle Bike with stabilizers. 26 00:02:40,744 --> 00:02:44,705 But please don't bring it if it makes you and the reindeer burn. 27 00:02:44,957 --> 00:02:50,294 Love, Gwen Hines. 23 Mimosa Avenue, Trelew, Cornwall, England. 28 00:02:50,587 --> 00:02:53,005 ARTHUR: Dear Gwen, thank you for your letter 29 00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:56,259 and, heh, brilliant picture. 30 00:02:56,426 --> 00:03:01,138 Your request for a pink Twinkle Bike will be passed on to Santa. 31 00:03:01,306 --> 00:03:04,058 And, yes, do believe in Santa. 32 00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:06,727 He is real. 33 00:03:07,521 --> 00:03:09,480 He's the greatest man ever. 34 00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:12,650 And he can get around the world to every child 35 00:03:12,818 --> 00:03:15,486 without a single reindeer being roasted ali... 36 00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:17,530 Hurt. 37 00:03:18,073 --> 00:03:22,785 By the time the sun comes up on Christmas Day, he'll get to you too 38 00:03:23,453 --> 00:03:24,495 using his 39 00:03:24,663 --> 00:03:27,415 special magic. 40 00:03:40,888 --> 00:03:42,889 (♪♪♪) 41 00:03:48,103 --> 00:03:50,021 (OVER SPEAKERS) ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 42 00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:51,480 ♪ Santa's comin' to town ♪ ♪ 43 00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:52,481 (CLOCK TOLLS) 44 00:03:53,692 --> 00:03:55,693 (SQUAWKING) 45 00:04:10,292 --> 00:04:12,293 (♪♪♪) 46 00:04:18,216 --> 00:04:19,467 (CAWS) 47 00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:27,475 (♪♪♪) 48 00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:32,688 First Field Elf Battalion, set. 49 00:04:32,856 --> 00:04:35,441 Straighten that teddy bear, soldier. Ma'am. 50 00:04:39,488 --> 00:04:41,197 SANTA: Ah. Hm. 51 00:04:41,907 --> 00:04:42,698 Ho, ho, ho. 52 00:04:42,866 --> 00:04:43,532 ANDREW: That's a: 53 00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:44,533 "Ho, ho, ho" Aarhus. 54 00:04:44,701 --> 00:04:45,701 CARLOS: Field elves, jingle! 55 00:04:45,869 --> 00:04:49,914 Jingle, jingle! Drop time, 18.14 seconds per household. 56 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:03,302 ANDREW: Left foot, sir. Right foot, sir. SANTA: Unh. Unh. 57 00:05:03,679 --> 00:05:05,471 Ooh, ha, ha, ha. ANDREW: That's it, that's it. 58 00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:06,514 (DOG BARKING) 59 00:05:06,682 --> 00:05:08,474 Dog food incoming. Meaty chunks in the hole. 60 00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:09,642 (CAR ALARM WALLS THEN CHIRPS) 61 00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:16,524 ELF 1: Wow, a grand piano. This kid must have been good his whole life. 62 00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:39,046 (BABIES CRYING) 63 00:05:41,633 --> 00:05:44,301 Marvelous. Gets me every time. 64 00:05:47,139 --> 00:05:48,305 (MAN SNORING) 65 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:51,392 (PARROT SQUAWKING) 66 00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:53,644 Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. 67 00:05:55,063 --> 00:05:55,980 Merry... 68 00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:07,700 Carrot chomped. 69 00:06:10,954 --> 00:06:12,329 (SNORING) 70 00:06:25,677 --> 00:06:26,343 (GASPS) 71 00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:47,865 (WATCH BEEPS) 72 00:06:48,033 --> 00:06:50,284 Ahem. Sir? Oh! Goodness me. 73 00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:51,786 (SANTA CHUCKLES THEN GRUNTS) 74 00:06:52,454 --> 00:06:53,996 Sorry. Heh, heh. 75 00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:56,290 Drop complete. Stand by, S-1. 76 00:06:56,458 --> 00:06:58,918 ELF 2: You're gonna make it, soldier. Aarhus is merry. 77 00:06:59,252 --> 00:07:00,669 ELF 3 (OVER RADIO): Santa has left the building. 78 00:07:08,220 --> 00:07:09,804 (♪♪♪) 79 00:07:14,226 --> 00:07:16,018 STEVE (OVER RADIO): North Pole to S-1, you have weather 80 00:07:16,186 --> 00:07:17,770 fluctuation. Update camouflage. 81 00:07:17,938 --> 00:07:19,396 ELF 4: Roger that, Control. 82 00:07:19,606 --> 00:07:20,439 Hull projection 83 00:07:20,607 --> 00:07:21,857 optimized. SARAH: Roger, S-1. 84 00:07:22,025 --> 00:07:23,150 CHRIS: Denmark cleared. 85 00:07:23,318 --> 00:07:26,445 STEVE: Next drop, Flensburg, minus 12.4 seconds. 86 00:07:27,572 --> 00:07:28,405 COMPUTER: Flensburg weather: 87 00:07:28,865 --> 00:07:29,824 Deep, crisp, even. 88 00:07:29,991 --> 00:07:31,492 ELF 5: Making a list. ELF 6: Check it twice. 89 00:07:31,660 --> 00:07:33,327 ELF 5: Checking twice. ELF 6: A wrap for Denmark. 90 00:07:33,495 --> 00:07:35,287 COMPUTER: Converting milk and cookies to biofuel. 91 00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:36,705 (KNOCK ON DOOR) 92 00:07:37,415 --> 00:07:38,415 SANTA: Hello? Oh. 93 00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:40,459 Ah. Ha, ha. Uh... 94 00:07:40,669 --> 00:07:42,670 COMPUTER: Santa on bridge. SANTA: Sorry. 95 00:07:42,838 --> 00:07:43,796 Forgot the PIN code. 96 00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:45,881 Just crossed into Germany, sir. 97 00:07:46,091 --> 00:07:47,258 Germany. 98 00:07:47,425 --> 00:07:49,927 So many countries these days. CHRIS: It's a big night, sir. 99 00:07:50,512 --> 00:07:52,930 My, uh, 70th mission. Yes. 100 00:07:53,098 --> 00:07:54,014 (BELCHES) 101 00:07:54,182 --> 00:07:55,099 Oh, sorry. 102 00:07:55,267 --> 00:07:57,768 One too many mince pies. 103 00:07:57,978 --> 00:07:59,645 Looking forward to it? Retirement? 104 00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:01,438 Hm? Oh! 105 00:08:01,773 --> 00:08:03,440 COMPUTER: Ten seconds to Flensburg. 106 00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:05,276 Maintain current, um... 107 00:08:05,861 --> 00:08:08,404 Carry on. COMPUTER: Update national protocol. 108 00:08:08,572 --> 00:08:11,532 Delete rice pudding and carrot. German leave-out for Santa 109 00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:14,785 is shoe on front step. Repeat, shoe on step. 110 00:08:15,871 --> 00:08:18,247 ELF 1: 600AM3. ELF 2: Gift secured. 111 00:08:18,415 --> 00:08:20,541 CARLOS: Oi, soldier. Get off your baubles. 112 00:08:20,709 --> 00:08:23,460 What happened to peace and goodwill to all men, sarge? 113 00:08:23,628 --> 00:08:26,130 It don't say nothing about elves, soldier. Go, go, go! 114 00:08:26,298 --> 00:08:27,464 STEVE (OVER PA): Engage rooftops. 115 00:08:27,632 --> 00:08:28,465 ELF 3: It's snow time! 116 00:08:31,386 --> 00:08:33,053 STEVE: S-1, hold drop altitude. 117 00:08:33,221 --> 00:08:34,346 This is Germany, Father. 118 00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:37,266 Drive on the right. National dish: sausage. 119 00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:39,143 Okay, let's show them, people. 120 00:08:39,311 --> 00:08:42,563 Operation Santa Claus is coming to town. 121 00:08:43,565 --> 00:08:45,566 (♪♪♪) 122 00:08:58,955 --> 00:09:00,414 ELF 1: Drop complete. ELF 2: Drop complete. 123 00:09:00,582 --> 00:09:02,291 ELF 3: Drop complete. ELF 4: Drop complete. 124 00:09:02,459 --> 00:09:04,585 ELF 5: Drop complete. ELF 6: Drop complete. 125 00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:07,129 (ELVES CHATTERING) 126 00:09:10,634 --> 00:09:12,259 COMPUTER: Operational efficiency: 127 00:09:12,427 --> 00:09:13,385 One hundred percent. Wow. 128 00:09:13,553 --> 00:09:14,261 DAVID: Hold the handrail. 129 00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:15,638 Whoa! Oops. 130 00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:16,764 Dear, I'm sorry. 131 00:09:16,932 --> 00:09:17,932 Thanks. Brendon Doherty. 132 00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:19,642 Ruby Miller. That's Grace Smith. 133 00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:20,643 She wants 134 00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:22,728 an elephant. DAVID: What are you doing here? 135 00:09:22,896 --> 00:09:24,855 Got to get this letter from Maria Costa 136 00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:25,773 to Steve. 137 00:09:25,941 --> 00:09:26,607 Oh, no! Maria! 138 00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:28,359 DAVID: Whoops! Bye-bye, Maria. 139 00:09:28,526 --> 00:09:29,235 ARTHUR: Whoa! 140 00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:30,569 Is this yours, Arthur? 141 00:09:30,737 --> 00:09:31,862 Oh, thanks, Kenneth. 142 00:09:32,030 --> 00:09:33,197 Merry Christmas. DAVID: Want 143 00:09:33,365 --> 00:09:34,114 a ride? 144 00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:35,115 ELF 7: Doubt it. 145 00:09:35,367 --> 00:09:36,617 No, thanks. I'm not 146 00:09:36,785 --> 00:09:38,452 very good with heights, speed 147 00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:39,370 and that thing! 148 00:09:39,537 --> 00:09:42,081 Buckle down, people. Buckle down. 149 00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:43,415 STEVE: Peter. Ready, sir. 150 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:45,292 SITREP on special forces. 151 00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:47,044 Where are they? PETER: America, sir. 152 00:09:47,254 --> 00:09:49,755 White House. Delivering to the president's children, sir. 153 00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:53,175 STEVE: Okay. Left out of the Oval Office, right at the Cabinet Room 154 00:09:53,343 --> 00:09:54,385 via the air vents. 155 00:09:54,552 --> 00:09:56,345 You think of everything, sir. 156 00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:58,681 Thank you, Peter. I'd love an espresso. 157 00:09:58,848 --> 00:09:59,848 Coming right up. Heh, heh. 158 00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:02,309 ARTHUR: Oop! Beg your pardon. Well done! 159 00:10:02,477 --> 00:10:03,727 Merry Christmas. 160 00:10:04,396 --> 00:10:06,355 Wow, brilliant. ELF 8: Mind the glasses. 161 00:10:06,523 --> 00:10:07,564 ARTHUR: Keep up, everybody. 162 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:10,609 ELF 9: Arthur. Sorry. Can I just...? Um... 163 00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:11,610 No, never mind. 164 00:10:11,778 --> 00:10:12,820 Do you mind if I...? Ow! 165 00:10:12,988 --> 00:10:13,654 Oh, dear. 166 00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:14,488 I'm so sorry. 167 00:10:14,656 --> 00:10:16,782 6B... Merry Christmas. 168 00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:19,702 FRC... And a happy New Year. 169 00:10:20,078 --> 00:10:21,078 (SIGHS) 170 00:10:21,579 --> 00:10:22,746 PETER: What a night, sir. 171 00:10:23,164 --> 00:10:24,707 Out with the old Santa, 172 00:10:24,874 --> 00:10:27,001 in with the new, eh? 173 00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:29,920 Let's focus on the now, eh, Peter? 174 00:10:30,088 --> 00:10:30,921 Support teams, 175 00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:32,881 prep Poland. COMPUTER: Poland. 176 00:10:33,049 --> 00:10:34,800 Poland. Do you know what they call 177 00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:36,176 Dad here? 178 00:10:38,763 --> 00:10:40,264 (SPEAKS IN POLISH) 179 00:10:42,225 --> 00:10:42,975 Anyway. 180 00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:44,018 I guess he's harmless. 181 00:10:44,185 --> 00:10:44,852 Ow! 182 00:10:45,103 --> 00:10:46,312 (ELVES GRUNTING AND GROANING) 183 00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:47,563 ARTHUR: I'm terribly sorry. 184 00:10:47,731 --> 00:10:48,522 Is that your leg? Whoo! 185 00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:52,359 I'm sorry! 186 00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:56,780 I'm really sorry. It's my Christmas slippers on the ice. 187 00:10:56,948 --> 00:10:58,324 (SLIPPERS PLAY "SILENT NIGHT") 188 00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:00,034 They're from China. 189 00:11:00,201 --> 00:11:01,160 Found it. What? 190 00:11:01,328 --> 00:11:02,578 The letter. The one I said. 191 00:11:02,746 --> 00:11:04,038 From Maria Costa. 192 00:11:04,205 --> 00:11:06,999 She asked for a Pocket-Puppy, but she wants the blue one. 193 00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:09,585 It looks like her auntie's dog, Biffo, that ran away. 194 00:11:09,753 --> 00:11:11,211 I remember because she sent 195 00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:12,629 a picture of Biffo. See? 196 00:11:12,797 --> 00:11:14,381 PETER: Child CG786K? Look, Arthur. 197 00:11:15,258 --> 00:11:16,675 This was Greece, sir. 198 00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:18,427 Five countries ago, sir. 199 00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:20,846 Oh. Um... 200 00:11:21,473 --> 00:11:24,558 I just want it to be perfect for every kid. 201 00:11:24,726 --> 00:11:27,061 Hey, there's Dad. Santa! 202 00:11:27,228 --> 00:11:30,731 Maria Costa, Dad. Did she get the blue one?! 203 00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:33,108 Little bro, it's great to have you around. 204 00:11:33,276 --> 00:11:38,364 You bring a genuine aura of seasonal positivity. 205 00:11:38,573 --> 00:11:39,239 Heh. Thanks, Steve. 206 00:11:39,407 --> 00:11:43,077 But could you not be in Mission Control 207 00:11:43,244 --> 00:11:46,330 at all for the rest of the night? 208 00:11:46,790 --> 00:11:49,750 Oh. Um... Uh... 209 00:11:50,001 --> 00:11:50,751 Yeah. 210 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,336 ELF 10: All right? ELF 11: I'll never walk 211 00:11:54,798 --> 00:11:55,964 Right. 212 00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:58,550 Sorry if I... Uh... 213 00:11:59,302 --> 00:11:59,968 Brilliant. 214 00:12:01,179 --> 00:12:02,179 ELF 12: They should put him 215 00:12:02,347 --> 00:12:05,307 somewhere out of harm's way. What, like the South Pole? 216 00:12:05,475 --> 00:12:06,642 (ALARM WALLS) 217 00:12:07,018 --> 00:12:07,726 SEAMUS: Waker! 218 00:12:08,103 --> 00:12:09,144 We have a waker! 219 00:12:10,146 --> 00:12:11,480 And Santa's in there! 220 00:12:11,648 --> 00:12:12,439 (GASPS) 221 00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:14,108 (ALL GASPING) 222 00:12:14,692 --> 00:12:15,901 COMPUTER: Code red. 223 00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:18,070 Repeat: code red. 224 00:12:27,205 --> 00:12:30,082 Santa? Are you here? 225 00:12:36,172 --> 00:12:37,047 (PRESENT MOOS) 226 00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:38,006 (WHISPERS) Ooh. Steve? 227 00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:39,258 STEVE: Hold on, Father. 228 00:12:39,426 --> 00:12:40,676 Intel! Get me Intel! 229 00:12:40,844 --> 00:12:42,469 PETER: Santa's head seems to be resting 230 00:12:42,637 --> 00:12:45,139 on some sort of "try me" button, sir. 231 00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:46,515 (ALL GASP) 232 00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:49,017 It's the Quack Quack Moo Activity Farm, sir. 233 00:12:49,227 --> 00:12:51,061 It features 12 separate animal sounds. 234 00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:53,772 Sings "Old MacDonald Had A Farm." PETER: The moment 235 00:12:53,940 --> 00:12:57,651 your father lifts his head, there'll be 10 seconds of constant mooing. 236 00:12:57,861 --> 00:12:59,194 COMPUTER: Risk of mooing: 98 percent. 237 00:12:59,362 --> 00:13:00,988 STEVE: Captain Marino, 238 00:13:01,156 --> 00:13:03,240 you'll have to take the batteries out. 239 00:13:03,408 --> 00:13:04,491 He'd have to get past 240 00:13:04,659 --> 00:13:08,245 the wrapping, the box and 14 twist ties anchoring it to the cardboard. 241 00:13:08,455 --> 00:13:09,413 It's too noisy! 242 00:13:09,581 --> 00:13:11,415 It'll wake the boy! He'll see Santa! 243 00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,584 ELF 13: Remember 1816 244 00:13:13,751 --> 00:13:16,253 when Santa was seen. They tracked him home. 245 00:13:16,463 --> 00:13:17,629 He had to go into hiding. 246 00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:22,468 No Christmas for six years. The elves all alone! 247 00:13:22,677 --> 00:13:24,428 ELF 14: The elves alone! 248 00:13:24,596 --> 00:13:25,554 (WHIMPERS) 249 00:13:25,763 --> 00:13:26,805 STEVE: Calm, people! 250 00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:28,849 It's not 1816 now. 251 00:13:29,058 --> 00:13:32,144 Marino, your HOHO is equipped with state-of-the-art 252 00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:35,898 EMF sensor technology hacked directly from the military's missile program. 253 00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:37,816 I want you to locate the batteries 254 00:13:37,984 --> 00:13:40,569 and perform a Level 3 giftwrap incision. 255 00:13:41,029 --> 00:13:42,446 Go in through the robin. 256 00:13:46,117 --> 00:13:47,618 COMPUTER: Incising robin. 257 00:13:50,455 --> 00:13:52,456 (♪♪♪) 258 00:13:55,418 --> 00:13:56,543 GRANDSANTA: Big girl's blouse. 259 00:13:56,711 --> 00:13:57,794 Lot of fuss. 260 00:13:57,962 --> 00:13:59,880 I did my 70 missions 261 00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:02,216 without any of this malarkey. 262 00:14:02,759 --> 00:14:04,468 Didn't we, lad? Ha, ha. 263 00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:07,346 COMPUTER: Twist ties clear. Can I watch with you, Grandsanta? 264 00:14:07,514 --> 00:14:08,597 Shut the door! 265 00:14:08,765 --> 00:14:09,806 Hell's berries, 266 00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:13,185 it's the North Pole! Kid still asleep? He mustn't see Santa. 267 00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:15,687 Dad would rather die than spoil it. What if you 268 00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:17,439 wake the odd nipper? A whack 269 00:14:17,607 --> 00:14:20,025 with a sock of sand, dab of whiskey on the lips, 270 00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:21,735 they don't remember. 271 00:14:21,903 --> 00:14:23,237 Ha, ha, ha. 272 00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:25,697 COMPUTER: Screwdriver elf. ARTHUR: Yes! Ha-ha-ha! 273 00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:26,615 GRANDSANTA: What happened 274 00:14:26,783 --> 00:14:29,952 to going down the "chimbley"? Never did me any har... 275 00:14:30,119 --> 00:14:30,911 (COUGHS) 276 00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:32,120 Get off me! 277 00:14:32,288 --> 00:14:33,539 You smell like a wet elf. 278 00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:35,499 Goodness! Down, boy! Basket. 279 00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:37,042 Here you are, Grandsanta. 280 00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:39,044 I've made you a nice mince pie. 281 00:14:39,212 --> 00:14:41,004 I can't eat that. It gets in me teeth. 282 00:14:41,172 --> 00:14:42,130 Oh, dear. 283 00:14:42,298 --> 00:14:43,423 Now I've got to visit 284 00:14:43,591 --> 00:14:44,341 the elf hospital, 285 00:14:44,509 --> 00:14:47,094 look over a treaty with Greenland and make the gravy. 286 00:14:47,262 --> 00:14:50,347 Then we'll finally have the whole family home for Christmas. 287 00:14:50,515 --> 00:14:51,765 They're nearly done! 288 00:14:52,016 --> 00:14:52,933 COMPUTER: Battery clear. 289 00:14:53,101 --> 00:14:53,850 (BEEPING ON TV) 290 00:14:54,018 --> 00:14:54,685 Oh, no. 291 00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:55,644 (ALL GASP) 292 00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:57,563 It's the detachable milk maid! 293 00:14:57,772 --> 00:15:00,023 She's got her own power source! NORAH: Five seconds 294 00:15:00,525 --> 00:15:02,192 till she starts singing! 295 00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:03,068 (ALL GASP) 296 00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:04,903 Four! 297 00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:07,030 Three! 298 00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:09,324 Two! 299 00:15:10,577 --> 00:15:11,410 One! 300 00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:12,869 Use your HOHO. Exit 301 00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:13,912 code 12. Code 12! 302 00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:15,455 (PRESENT MOOS) 303 00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:16,873 TOY: ♪ Old McDonald had a farm ♪ ♪ 304 00:15:17,292 --> 00:15:18,542 (PLAYS "LA CUCARACHA") 305 00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:25,007 (PLAYS SOUND OF CAR HORN PASSING) 306 00:15:26,050 --> 00:15:26,967 (ALL SIGH) 307 00:15:27,135 --> 00:15:28,468 Okay, go, go, go! 308 00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:30,804 Revise drop time to 14.13 seconds. 309 00:15:30,972 --> 00:15:32,347 Let's pick this up, people! 310 00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:33,181 COMPUTER: Drop time 311 00:15:33,349 --> 00:15:34,850 revised. Picking this up, 312 00:15:35,018 --> 00:15:35,976 people. 313 00:15:36,144 --> 00:15:37,227 ELF 1: Everybody, mission 314 00:15:37,395 --> 00:15:38,437 re-engage. 315 00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:44,318 ALL: Three, 316 00:15:44,485 --> 00:15:45,319 two, 317 00:15:45,486 --> 00:15:46,320 one! 318 00:15:47,655 --> 00:15:49,031 COMPUTER: Mission accomplished. 319 00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:50,324 (ALL CHEERING) 320 00:15:50,491 --> 00:15:51,658 Hey! 321 00:15:51,826 --> 00:15:53,660 (SNORING) 322 00:15:58,416 --> 00:16:00,334 Oh, what a night that was. 323 00:16:00,501 --> 00:16:02,294 That detachable milk maid thing. 324 00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:05,380 This is just the beginning, right, sir? 325 00:16:06,257 --> 00:16:07,799 I got you a present, sir. 326 00:16:08,176 --> 00:16:10,344 Not S for Steve, sir. 327 00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:13,096 S for Santa. 328 00:16:13,848 --> 00:16:17,392 Oh, I don't know about that, Peter. Okay, 329 00:16:17,602 --> 00:16:19,269 let's bring them home. 330 00:16:19,646 --> 00:16:21,647 (♪♪♪) 331 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:25,984 (BARKING) 332 00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:46,004 (CROWD CHEERING) 333 00:16:54,180 --> 00:16:55,055 FERGUS: CCTV 334 00:16:55,306 --> 00:16:57,140 in every room! Had to go under the floor! 335 00:16:57,308 --> 00:16:58,058 ELF 1: Sarah. 336 00:16:58,226 --> 00:17:00,435 CARLOS: Back! Holly injury coming through! 337 00:17:00,770 --> 00:17:01,436 (YELLS) 338 00:17:01,604 --> 00:17:02,562 NORAH: Hey, fancy 339 00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:04,231 a trip on the S-1, Arthur? 340 00:17:04,399 --> 00:17:05,982 It only goes 150,000 341 00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:07,901 miles an hour. No, no. Thanks. 342 00:17:08,069 --> 00:17:10,237 I see a bit of the world in my office, you know. 343 00:17:10,405 --> 00:17:12,698 Some of the stamps I get are amazing. 344 00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:13,532 (HORN HONKS) 345 00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:14,533 BRYONY: Excuse me. 346 00:17:15,410 --> 00:17:16,743 ALL: Santa! 347 00:17:17,078 --> 00:17:17,953 ARTHUR: Dad! 348 00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:19,871 Dad! Dad! 349 00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:21,915 I'm sorry. So sorry. Dad! 350 00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:23,125 Dad! 351 00:17:23,292 --> 00:17:24,918 Santa's waving! ELF 2: He's waving at me! 352 00:17:25,086 --> 00:17:26,420 DEBORAH: He's waving at me! ELF 3: At me! 353 00:17:26,587 --> 00:17:28,004 Dad! Ha, ha! 354 00:17:29,132 --> 00:17:30,340 Arthur. 355 00:17:30,508 --> 00:17:32,050 Happy Christmas. 356 00:17:32,635 --> 00:17:33,885 You too. 357 00:17:35,096 --> 00:17:36,847 You were fantastic! 358 00:17:37,014 --> 00:17:38,056 (CHUCKLES) 359 00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:40,350 Look! Christmas slippers. 360 00:17:40,727 --> 00:17:43,228 Ha! Well done. Yes. 361 00:17:43,855 --> 00:17:44,896 STEVE: Father? 362 00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:48,358 Ah, there he is. Steve! 363 00:17:49,402 --> 00:17:51,445 (ALL APPLAUDING) 364 00:17:52,864 --> 00:17:55,574 Mission accomplished! 365 00:17:56,117 --> 00:17:57,534 (ALL CHEERING) 366 00:17:59,537 --> 00:18:00,579 Tonight we delivered 367 00:18:01,289 --> 00:18:03,707 2 billion presents. 368 00:18:03,916 --> 00:18:05,375 On this, 369 00:18:05,543 --> 00:18:07,043 my 70th mission! 370 00:18:07,754 --> 00:18:08,879 (CROWD CHEERS) 371 00:18:09,046 --> 00:18:10,839 ELF 5: We'll miss you, Santa! 372 00:18:11,007 --> 00:18:11,673 Stand by. 373 00:18:11,841 --> 00:18:12,507 Psst! 374 00:18:12,675 --> 00:18:13,341 (FEEDBACK SQUEALS) 375 00:18:14,552 --> 00:18:15,969 Oh, thank you. 376 00:18:16,637 --> 00:18:19,431 You know, I sometimes think I couldn't do it without you. 377 00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:20,265 (SANTA CHUCKLES) 378 00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:21,391 And my splendid 379 00:18:21,559 --> 00:18:25,020 Margaret, who's stood by me all these years 380 00:18:25,188 --> 00:18:27,606 very ably doing all that, uh... 381 00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:28,899 stuff 382 00:18:29,066 --> 00:18:31,568 that women do when their husbands work. Marvelous. 383 00:18:31,861 --> 00:18:33,278 (CROWD CHEERS) 384 00:18:34,197 --> 00:18:35,655 And, uh, Arthur, yes, doing 385 00:18:35,823 --> 00:18:37,824 vital work in Maintenance, really vital. 386 00:18:37,992 --> 00:18:39,326 I, um... I work 387 00:18:39,494 --> 00:18:40,202 in Letters. 388 00:18:40,369 --> 00:18:43,538 Letters, of course. I'm so sorry. ARTHUR: You moved me 389 00:18:43,706 --> 00:18:46,917 after I tripped over that plug and melted down the elf barracks. 390 00:18:47,084 --> 00:18:48,335 DAVID: I lost everything in that flood! 391 00:18:49,086 --> 00:18:50,545 SANTA: Yes. Now, 392 00:18:51,756 --> 00:18:55,675 many years ago, my father told me 393 00:18:55,843 --> 00:18:56,760 (SNORES) 394 00:18:57,595 --> 00:19:01,431 that being Santa is the best job in the world. 395 00:19:02,016 --> 00:19:03,558 He was right. 396 00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:05,435 I've loved it. 397 00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:07,729 (♪♪♪) 398 00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:12,067 I can't wait for year 71! 399 00:19:14,904 --> 00:19:16,321 (ALL CHEERING) 400 00:19:17,740 --> 00:19:19,241 Merry Christmas, everyone. 401 00:19:25,915 --> 00:19:26,665 (GRUNTS) 402 00:19:31,629 --> 00:19:35,215 ELVES (CHANTING): He's red, he's white! He's worked all through the night! 403 00:19:35,383 --> 00:19:37,008 Santa! 404 00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:49,813 (ARTHUR GRUNTS) 405 00:19:51,607 --> 00:19:55,861 "What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? 406 00:19:56,279 --> 00:19:57,946 Tinselitis!" 407 00:19:58,114 --> 00:20:00,073 (LAUGHS) 408 00:20:01,784 --> 00:20:04,286 Isn't this the best bit of Christmas? 409 00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:06,913 (SANTA YAWNS) 410 00:20:07,081 --> 00:20:11,334 It certainly is, Arthur. The whole family together. 411 00:20:11,502 --> 00:20:13,336 How about a toast, Malcolm? 412 00:20:13,504 --> 00:20:14,838 Oh! Um... 413 00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:18,592 Well, uh, here's to me doing an even better job next year. 414 00:20:18,801 --> 00:20:20,218 MRS. SANTA: Next year. ARTHUR: But you're 415 00:20:20,386 --> 00:20:23,430 already perfect, Dad. Ha! That turkey did more than him. 416 00:20:23,598 --> 00:20:24,890 Ha, ha! Aah! 417 00:20:25,308 --> 00:20:27,225 SANTA: You wouldn't understand, Father. 418 00:20:27,435 --> 00:20:30,562 I've rather moved things on since your day. Eh, Steve? 419 00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:35,483 Forget Techno Tommy. He's texting on his calculator after another job. 420 00:20:35,651 --> 00:20:36,610 It's a Handheld 421 00:20:36,819 --> 00:20:39,946 Operational and Homing Organizer. The HOHO 3000. 422 00:20:40,948 --> 00:20:42,616 I'm enacting mission closure. 423 00:20:42,783 --> 00:20:45,118 Whoopee-doo. Aren't you the fancy nancy? 424 00:20:45,286 --> 00:20:46,912 Don't matter what you come up with. 425 00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:51,207 You may be next in line, but you'll never get to be Santa unless you knock him off. 426 00:20:51,918 --> 00:20:53,209 (♪♪♪) 427 00:20:53,377 --> 00:20:54,461 ARTHUR: Um... 428 00:20:54,670 --> 00:20:56,004 I've got you all a present. 429 00:20:56,213 --> 00:21:00,926 After all the hard work, I wanted everyone to have some Christmas fun. 430 00:21:01,093 --> 00:21:02,677 Ta-da! 431 00:21:12,688 --> 00:21:14,189 (BICYCLE BELL RINGS) 432 00:21:18,319 --> 00:21:19,945 (GRUNTING) 433 00:21:20,279 --> 00:21:21,446 (GASPS) 434 00:21:22,198 --> 00:21:25,158 GRANDSANTA: I'm Santa! STEVE: No, no, I'm Santa. It's ridiculous. 435 00:21:25,326 --> 00:21:28,995 You just took the piece out of my hand. Well, I am actually Santa 436 00:21:29,163 --> 00:21:30,705 so I think I should have it. 437 00:21:30,873 --> 00:21:33,667 Yes. You're the nonexecutive figurehead. SANTA: Exactly. 438 00:21:33,834 --> 00:21:34,960 Figurehead. GRANDSANTA: It means 439 00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:37,253 a fatty with a beard who fits the suit. 440 00:21:37,964 --> 00:21:39,464 The other pieces are good too. 441 00:21:39,632 --> 00:21:41,675 Or I can make extra Santas for everyone. 442 00:21:42,760 --> 00:21:44,386 Why don't you be the candle, Steve? 443 00:21:44,804 --> 00:21:46,721 All those bright ideas, eh? 444 00:21:46,889 --> 00:21:50,266 Fine. I'm the candle, Arthur's the turkey 445 00:21:50,434 --> 00:21:53,937 and you, Father, are, of course, Santa. 446 00:21:54,105 --> 00:21:56,523 Grandsanta, you can be this charming relic. 447 00:21:56,691 --> 00:21:58,608 "Relic"? "Relic"? 448 00:21:58,776 --> 00:22:01,361 I did the whole of Christmas in one of these, Arthur. 449 00:22:01,529 --> 00:22:04,823 Oh, yes. I didn't need a trillion elves in bleepy hats. 450 00:22:04,991 --> 00:22:06,032 We don't fly about 451 00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:08,910 throwing lead-painted toys down chimneys anymore. 452 00:22:09,078 --> 00:22:10,412 That space sends you back 453 00:22:10,579 --> 00:22:13,373 to Lapland. Malcolm, where did you get those? 454 00:22:13,541 --> 00:22:16,084 Just moving things along. Do I win? 455 00:22:16,252 --> 00:22:17,794 Cheats, the pair of you! 456 00:22:17,962 --> 00:22:19,129 ARTHUR: Mum, are you okay? 457 00:22:19,296 --> 00:22:23,216 Polar bear, dear. Attacked me on the ice. Good I did that online survival course 458 00:22:23,384 --> 00:22:25,969 or there'd be one less for turkey. GRANDSANTA: Christmas has 459 00:22:26,137 --> 00:22:29,639 gone right down the rodney hole. You're a postman with a spaceship. 460 00:22:30,433 --> 00:22:35,311 My S-1 festivized the world at 1860 times the speed of sound. 461 00:22:35,479 --> 00:22:38,023 Christmas 1941, World War II, 462 00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:40,900 did the whole thing with six reindeer and a drunken elf! 463 00:22:41,068 --> 00:22:42,610 I was shot at, Arthur. 464 00:22:42,778 --> 00:22:45,030 Took 12 direct hits. Lost three reindeer. 465 00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:45,864 ARTHUR: What happened 466 00:22:46,032 --> 00:22:48,283 to the elf? Fell out of the sleigh over Lake Geneva. 467 00:22:48,451 --> 00:22:49,367 Never saw him again. 468 00:22:49,577 --> 00:22:50,702 Goodness. Now... 469 00:22:50,870 --> 00:22:54,456 "Christmas crackers. Sing 'Silent Night' backwards." 470 00:22:54,623 --> 00:22:55,290 Who'd know that? 471 00:22:55,458 --> 00:22:56,166 (BELL RINGS) 472 00:22:56,375 --> 00:22:59,002 (SINGING GIBBERISH) 473 00:23:02,256 --> 00:23:03,506 I went on alone. 474 00:23:03,674 --> 00:23:06,634 I could still do it now, Arthur. Just give me a go! 475 00:23:06,802 --> 00:23:09,012 In a heap of sticks. "Heap of... "? 476 00:23:09,180 --> 00:23:10,388 Let me up and at him! 477 00:23:10,556 --> 00:23:12,974 I'll show you, Robby the Robot! 478 00:23:13,184 --> 00:23:15,143 Oh, dear. Oh, dear. 479 00:23:15,436 --> 00:23:16,394 I'll have that back. 480 00:23:16,562 --> 00:23:17,228 (HOHO CHIMES) 481 00:23:17,396 --> 00:23:18,313 GRANDSANTA: Would've won anyway. What? 482 00:23:18,522 --> 00:23:20,231 Oh, yeah. Run away 483 00:23:20,399 --> 00:23:21,941 now you're losing! 484 00:23:24,737 --> 00:23:25,862 (♪♪♪) 485 00:23:26,030 --> 00:23:26,696 ARTHUR: Steve! 486 00:23:26,864 --> 00:23:27,655 Whoa! Unh! 487 00:23:28,407 --> 00:23:29,324 Steve. 488 00:23:29,492 --> 00:23:30,658 Don't be upset. Look. 489 00:23:31,285 --> 00:23:31,951 You keep this. 490 00:23:33,329 --> 00:23:35,955 Then you can be Santa next time. 491 00:23:37,583 --> 00:23:38,917 That'll be you there, Steve. 492 00:23:40,002 --> 00:23:40,668 Next year, 493 00:23:40,836 --> 00:23:41,795 I bet. 494 00:23:42,171 --> 00:23:43,755 You'll be great. 495 00:23:45,257 --> 00:23:46,966 How many times, Arthur? 496 00:23:47,134 --> 00:23:51,179 It's the North Pole. Shut the doors. 497 00:23:52,098 --> 00:23:53,932 (DOOR SLAMS) 498 00:23:54,433 --> 00:23:55,225 BRYONY: I secured the gift. 499 00:23:55,392 --> 00:23:57,477 Gift secured! Just can't be. 500 00:23:57,645 --> 00:23:58,978 The system is foolproof. 501 00:23:59,146 --> 00:24:00,438 It has to be an error, sir. 502 00:24:00,606 --> 00:24:01,481 "Error"? 503 00:24:01,690 --> 00:24:03,775 I spotted the ribbon glinting in the shadows. 504 00:24:04,193 --> 00:24:05,026 I am actually 505 00:24:05,194 --> 00:24:06,277 trained in wrapping. 506 00:24:06,445 --> 00:24:10,698 And I said to myself, "Bryony, the wrapping looks okay. Thank goodness. 507 00:24:10,866 --> 00:24:13,201 But that present should not be lying in the..." 508 00:24:13,410 --> 00:24:15,161 Thank you, soldier. ARTHUR: Has someone 509 00:24:15,329 --> 00:24:17,288 got the wrong present? That's awful. 510 00:24:17,456 --> 00:24:18,498 Whose is it? No one 511 00:24:18,666 --> 00:24:19,582 gets the wrong 512 00:24:19,750 --> 00:24:21,376 present. 47785 513 00:24:21,544 --> 00:24:23,128 BXK. 514 00:24:23,295 --> 00:24:24,671 "Gift undelivered"? 515 00:24:24,839 --> 00:24:26,548 They got nothing? 516 00:24:26,757 --> 00:24:27,757 Mm-mm? ARTHUR: A child's 517 00:24:27,925 --> 00:24:29,008 been missed! 518 00:24:29,176 --> 00:24:31,052 Not necessarily. 519 00:24:32,012 --> 00:24:33,138 (ARTHUR GASPS) 520 00:24:33,639 --> 00:24:35,265 A child's been missed! 521 00:24:35,474 --> 00:24:36,891 Wanna wake up the North Pole? 522 00:24:37,059 --> 00:24:38,518 Good idea. A child's 523 00:24:38,686 --> 00:24:39,894 been missed! STEVE: Arthur! 524 00:24:40,396 --> 00:24:41,437 (SANTA YAWNS) 525 00:24:41,605 --> 00:24:42,647 Everything all right? 526 00:24:42,815 --> 00:24:44,190 There's been a glitch. 527 00:24:44,358 --> 00:24:46,734 "A glitch"? We've missed a child! 528 00:24:46,902 --> 00:24:49,028 Really? Dear, oh, dear. 529 00:24:49,196 --> 00:24:50,071 That's awful. 530 00:24:50,239 --> 00:24:51,823 How did you let it happen, Steven? 531 00:24:51,991 --> 00:24:53,950 How did I...? I thought it was your mission. 532 00:24:54,118 --> 00:24:56,411 No. This is your department. What'll we do? 533 00:24:56,579 --> 00:24:59,372 We must, um... We must, uh... 534 00:24:59,999 --> 00:25:02,375 What must we do, Steven? STEVE: There's nothing to do. 535 00:25:02,543 --> 00:25:04,169 The mission was a success. 536 00:25:04,336 --> 00:25:05,753 We can't leave a child out of Christmas. 537 00:25:05,921 --> 00:25:06,671 (SIGHS) 538 00:25:06,839 --> 00:25:08,047 Sunrise at destination 539 00:25:08,215 --> 00:25:11,050 is 7:39 a.m. There's no way to get there in time. 540 00:25:11,218 --> 00:25:12,719 Except, of course, for the S-1. 541 00:25:12,887 --> 00:25:14,929 The S-1 . Right-o. STEVE: No! The S-1 542 00:25:15,097 --> 00:25:17,307 has just traveled 7 million miles. 543 00:25:17,474 --> 00:25:18,558 We could damage it. 544 00:25:18,726 --> 00:25:20,143 Oh, dear. Um... 545 00:25:20,352 --> 00:25:23,062 And risk the lives of the elves. SANTA: Oh, my. No. 546 00:25:23,230 --> 00:25:24,522 I'll go, sir! 547 00:25:24,690 --> 00:25:25,940 Bryony Shelfley, 548 00:25:26,108 --> 00:25:28,109 Wrapping Division. Grade 3, sir. 549 00:25:28,319 --> 00:25:30,987 Who asked you? I wasn't called up for field duty. 550 00:25:31,155 --> 00:25:33,281 I served out my mission in Gift Wrap Support. 551 00:25:33,449 --> 00:25:36,868 I wrapped 264,000 presents in three days, sir. 552 00:25:37,119 --> 00:25:38,745 If you want that bike delivered 553 00:25:38,913 --> 00:25:40,246 in a perfect state 554 00:25:40,414 --> 00:25:42,081 of enwrapment, then I'm your elf. 555 00:25:42,249 --> 00:25:43,625 STEVE: No one is going. 556 00:25:43,792 --> 00:25:44,626 It's impossible. 557 00:25:44,793 --> 00:25:46,044 But this child... PETER: It's a 558 00:25:46,212 --> 00:25:51,549 margin of error of 0.00000001514834 percent, 559 00:25:53,886 --> 00:25:55,261 I mean, hello? 560 00:25:55,429 --> 00:25:56,512 Where's the champagne? 561 00:25:56,680 --> 00:26:01,351 My department has delivered the most outstanding Christmas ever. 562 00:26:01,518 --> 00:26:03,144 Oh, uh... Ha, ha. 563 00:26:03,354 --> 00:26:05,021 Well done, us. 564 00:26:05,189 --> 00:26:07,482 But there's a child without a present. 565 00:26:07,691 --> 00:26:10,193 Arthur, Christmas is not a time for emotion. 566 00:26:10,361 --> 00:26:13,446 We will get 47785BXK a present 567 00:26:13,614 --> 00:26:15,823 within the window of Christmas. 568 00:26:15,991 --> 00:26:18,493 We'll messenger the item. It'll be there in five days. 569 00:26:18,661 --> 00:26:20,662 But that'll ruin the magic. 570 00:26:20,871 --> 00:26:22,372 (SCOFFS) 571 00:26:23,165 --> 00:26:26,459 If there was any way at all to make the drop tonight. 572 00:26:26,669 --> 00:26:27,835 But it can't be done. 573 00:26:28,003 --> 00:26:29,045 SANTA: Your brother 574 00:26:29,213 --> 00:26:31,547 knows about these things. 575 00:26:31,715 --> 00:26:36,094 I won't sleep easy after this, Arthur, but there it is. 576 00:26:36,262 --> 00:26:37,512 Can't be done. 577 00:26:39,765 --> 00:26:41,599 Merry Christmas. 578 00:26:41,767 --> 00:26:44,060 (♪♪♪) 579 00:26:47,815 --> 00:26:49,857 Arthur! You're compromising 580 00:26:50,025 --> 00:26:51,651 the wrapping! That is not 581 00:26:51,819 --> 00:26:53,528 a toy! Well, it is, 582 00:26:53,696 --> 00:26:55,071 but, I mean, that's not... 583 00:26:55,281 --> 00:26:56,322 Arthur! 584 00:26:56,824 --> 00:26:58,533 ARTHUR: Um... Oh, come on, come on, 585 00:26:58,701 --> 00:27:02,203 come on. Child 47785BXK, 586 00:27:02,454 --> 00:27:03,871 where are you? 587 00:27:04,498 --> 00:27:05,456 (GRUNTS) 588 00:27:05,708 --> 00:27:08,167 "Dear Santa, my friend doesn't believe in you. 589 00:27:08,335 --> 00:27:11,379 For Christmas I'd like a pink Twinkle Bike. 590 00:27:11,714 --> 00:27:13,631 Gwen Hines. 591 00:27:13,799 --> 00:27:18,678 23 Mimosa Avenue, Trelew, Cornwall, England." 592 00:27:20,097 --> 00:27:22,098 (♪♪♪) 593 00:27:31,191 --> 00:27:32,692 (SIGHS) 594 00:27:42,953 --> 00:27:44,287 COMPUTER: Lights out. 595 00:27:45,789 --> 00:27:48,291 This figurehead thingy: 596 00:27:48,834 --> 00:27:51,419 I'm not just a fatty with a suit, am I? 597 00:27:51,587 --> 00:27:53,921 Of course not, dear. 598 00:27:54,089 --> 00:27:56,841 No. I'm Santa. 599 00:27:57,009 --> 00:27:58,343 Children 600 00:27:59,178 --> 00:28:01,054 rely on me. 601 00:28:01,221 --> 00:28:03,264 Oh. Ugh. Ha, ha. 602 00:28:03,474 --> 00:28:04,599 Here. 603 00:28:04,767 --> 00:28:08,561 Thank you. It's just checks for the boys and cash for Father. 604 00:28:08,729 --> 00:28:10,063 Oh, Malcolm. 605 00:28:10,230 --> 00:28:13,858 It's the 2 billion other gifts, dear. Christmas has become 606 00:28:14,026 --> 00:28:15,068 such a mad rush. 607 00:28:15,235 --> 00:28:17,820 Until you retire. 608 00:28:18,155 --> 00:28:19,739 Retire? 609 00:28:20,157 --> 00:28:22,658 Sit next to Father, watching Steve on TV? 610 00:28:22,826 --> 00:28:23,576 (HOHO VIBRATES) 611 00:28:23,744 --> 00:28:25,703 MAN (ON HOHO): You are sitting on a level one access HOHO. 612 00:28:25,871 --> 00:28:28,831 Please state your identity. State your identity. 613 00:28:29,792 --> 00:28:31,793 Who would I be? 614 00:28:32,461 --> 00:28:35,129 You'd be my Malcolm, dear. 615 00:28:35,589 --> 00:28:37,757 And there's Arthur. 616 00:28:37,966 --> 00:28:39,509 Dear Arthur. 617 00:28:39,676 --> 00:28:41,928 What a puzzle. This one's for me, dear. 618 00:28:42,513 --> 00:28:43,888 Oh! 619 00:28:44,848 --> 00:28:46,349 Happy Christmas, Margaret. 620 00:28:46,517 --> 00:28:47,558 Oh, thank you. 621 00:28:47,726 --> 00:28:50,770 I'm still very much up to the job, you know. Ho, ho... 622 00:28:50,938 --> 00:28:52,146 (YAWNS) 623 00:28:53,607 --> 00:28:55,108 Good night, dear. 624 00:28:55,901 --> 00:28:58,027 Good night, Malcolm. 625 00:28:59,947 --> 00:29:01,489 (♪♪♪) 626 00:29:01,740 --> 00:29:03,950 It just can't be. It can't. 627 00:29:04,159 --> 00:29:06,327 It just can't be. It can't. It just can't be! Oh! 628 00:29:06,495 --> 00:29:07,161 (GLASS BREAKS) 629 00:29:07,329 --> 00:29:07,995 GRANDSANTA: What's all this 630 00:29:08,163 --> 00:29:09,163 ka doodle, young man? 631 00:29:09,331 --> 00:29:10,039 Grandsanta. 632 00:29:10,207 --> 00:29:10,998 This little girl. 633 00:29:11,166 --> 00:29:12,166 She's been missed! 634 00:29:12,334 --> 00:29:15,795 Ha! So much for your brother's fancy-pants technology. 635 00:29:15,963 --> 00:29:18,673 Steve and Dad racked their brains but said it's impossible. 636 00:29:18,841 --> 00:29:20,007 Is it, now? 637 00:29:20,175 --> 00:29:23,928 Missed a child. Dear, oh dear, sends shivers down me shins. 638 00:29:24,096 --> 00:29:26,305 In two hours, she's gonna wake up 639 00:29:26,473 --> 00:29:29,976 tear downstairs, search under the tree 640 00:29:30,477 --> 00:29:33,855 and the look on her face. 641 00:29:35,482 --> 00:29:37,650 But there's nothing there. 642 00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:41,612 She won't understand. She'll think she's the one kid in the world 643 00:29:41,780 --> 00:29:44,323 that Santa doesn't care about. 644 00:29:44,658 --> 00:29:46,367 She'll feel so... 645 00:29:47,536 --> 00:29:48,995 left out. 646 00:29:50,289 --> 00:29:52,081 (♪♪♪) 647 00:29:52,291 --> 00:29:55,168 On Christmas night, he comes. 648 00:29:55,335 --> 00:29:58,004 Gwen can't not have a present from Santa. 649 00:29:58,172 --> 00:30:01,007 Do you know, Arthur, there is a way. 650 00:30:01,175 --> 00:30:02,800 It's impossible. 651 00:30:03,010 --> 00:30:06,387 They used to say it was impossible to teach women to read. 652 00:30:06,555 --> 00:30:08,347 Follow me. 653 00:30:10,559 --> 00:30:12,560 (♪♪♪) 654 00:30:37,211 --> 00:30:38,211 (GASPS) 655 00:30:38,420 --> 00:30:39,879 (♪♪♪) 656 00:30:41,381 --> 00:30:44,467 It's... It's the actual sleigh. 657 00:30:44,635 --> 00:30:46,385 Hello, Evie. 658 00:30:46,553 --> 00:30:48,221 I thought it was scrapped years ago. 659 00:30:48,388 --> 00:30:50,139 So did everyone else. 660 00:30:50,349 --> 00:30:51,224 Can I...? 661 00:30:51,391 --> 00:30:52,433 (GASPS) 662 00:30:52,601 --> 00:30:57,563 Icelandic birch. Arctic balsa. Built in 1845. 663 00:30:57,731 --> 00:31:02,401 Able to reach 50,000 miles per hour at a height of 40,000 feet. 664 00:31:02,569 --> 00:31:04,612 GRANDSANTA: Over here, you string of tinsel. 665 00:31:05,531 --> 00:31:06,572 Got it. 666 00:31:06,907 --> 00:31:08,407 "Potash of carboniloroxy 667 00:31:08,825 --> 00:31:09,992 amilocitrate." 668 00:31:10,160 --> 00:31:10,826 (GASPS) 669 00:31:11,578 --> 00:31:12,870 Magic dust. 670 00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:15,831 Mined from the aurora borealis. 671 00:31:16,458 --> 00:31:20,628 But she doesn't still go? 672 00:31:20,796 --> 00:31:22,421 Ha. 673 00:31:24,841 --> 00:31:26,384 Not just a hobby, Arthur. 674 00:31:27,386 --> 00:31:30,972 Great-great-grandchildren of the original eight. 675 00:31:31,181 --> 00:31:33,182 (MUFFLED TOOT) 676 00:31:37,813 --> 00:31:39,146 (SOUNDS) 677 00:31:39,815 --> 00:31:40,648 Dasher. 678 00:31:42,693 --> 00:31:43,651 Wow. Heh. 679 00:31:43,860 --> 00:31:45,194 Dancer. 680 00:31:45,445 --> 00:31:46,862 Prancer. 681 00:31:47,030 --> 00:31:52,076 Uh... What are the others called? I could never ruddy remember. Bambi? John. 682 00:31:52,244 --> 00:31:53,244 You there, with the 683 00:31:53,412 --> 00:31:54,579 white ear. And you. 684 00:31:54,746 --> 00:31:57,623 And... Not you, you bag of fleas. Uh... Uh... 685 00:31:57,916 --> 00:31:58,583 Arthur? 686 00:31:58,750 --> 00:31:59,500 (GRUNTS) 687 00:31:59,793 --> 00:32:01,502 I'm not really good with big animals. 688 00:32:01,670 --> 00:32:02,712 Piffle! Heh-heh-heh. 689 00:32:02,879 --> 00:32:05,673 Don't get bit, mind. They can smell fear. 690 00:32:05,882 --> 00:32:08,593 Let's hitch them up. Oh, Grandsanta. 691 00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:11,304 Uh, uh... Excuse me. Unh! 692 00:32:12,014 --> 00:32:13,973 You can go to Gwen! 693 00:32:14,141 --> 00:32:18,144 On the old sleigh, with the reindeer and the magic dust and everything! 694 00:32:18,312 --> 00:32:19,520 It's a miracle. 695 00:32:20,022 --> 00:32:21,606 You're coming too, lad. 696 00:32:22,441 --> 00:32:23,733 Me? 697 00:32:23,900 --> 00:32:27,194 On that? Up there? Pulled by them? 698 00:32:27,362 --> 00:32:28,029 (SNORTS) 699 00:32:28,572 --> 00:32:29,989 No. No way. 700 00:32:30,157 --> 00:32:34,619 I'm 136. I can't do it on me own, I need an elf. 701 00:32:34,786 --> 00:32:39,415 I can't fly a sleigh. I can't even ride a bike without stabilizers. 702 00:32:39,583 --> 00:32:41,125 I know, let's wake Steve. He'll... 703 00:32:41,293 --> 00:32:42,335 No. 704 00:32:42,544 --> 00:32:47,256 He's a worrier, Arthur. What if he stops us? Gwen's forgotten. 705 00:32:47,674 --> 00:32:49,759 You really care. Well, of course 706 00:32:49,926 --> 00:32:53,471 I do. I was Santa too. 707 00:32:54,389 --> 00:32:56,515 Think of your dad 708 00:32:56,683 --> 00:32:58,309 lying awake, chewing his 709 00:32:58,477 --> 00:33:01,020 beard off with worry over this girl. 710 00:33:01,188 --> 00:33:03,689 Don't you want to help for once? 711 00:33:03,857 --> 00:33:06,067 Make him proud? 712 00:33:06,401 --> 00:33:07,985 I can't. 713 00:33:08,445 --> 00:33:11,113 I just... I can't. 714 00:33:11,740 --> 00:33:13,658 No, I can't. 715 00:33:20,916 --> 00:33:22,541 (♪♪♪) 716 00:33:30,133 --> 00:33:31,258 Ready?! 717 00:33:31,968 --> 00:33:34,637 ARTHUR: No! You promise Ha, ha! 718 00:33:34,805 --> 00:33:36,430 Not to go too fast? Whoo-hoo! 719 00:33:37,015 --> 00:33:40,017 ARTHUR: Or high. Or bumpy. 720 00:33:40,185 --> 00:33:42,478 I get travel sick. I'm allergic to snow. 721 00:33:42,646 --> 00:33:45,398 Ye baubles. And you a son of Santa? 722 00:33:47,109 --> 00:33:47,983 (ARTHUR YELLS THEN SOBS) 723 00:33:50,112 --> 00:33:52,697 Wait! My slippers! They're not for outdoor use! 724 00:33:55,992 --> 00:33:57,660 GRANDSANTA: Dash! Dash! 725 00:33:57,911 --> 00:33:58,953 Dash! 726 00:33:59,121 --> 00:34:00,162 (♪♪♪) 727 00:34:03,208 --> 00:34:04,583 (GRANDSANTA LAUGHS) 728 00:34:05,502 --> 00:34:06,711 See? 729 00:34:06,878 --> 00:34:09,338 Who's Santa now? Ho, ho, ho! 730 00:34:09,506 --> 00:34:11,716 Whoo-hoo! 731 00:34:14,845 --> 00:34:17,346 ARTHUR: Aah! Put me down! 732 00:34:17,514 --> 00:34:19,390 What's the matter, boy? I'm having 733 00:34:19,558 --> 00:34:20,933 a heart attack. 734 00:34:21,101 --> 00:34:21,934 (RETCHES) 735 00:34:22,144 --> 00:34:22,893 (GRANDSANTA LAUGHS) 736 00:34:23,770 --> 00:34:25,771 They've never flown before. 737 00:34:25,981 --> 00:34:27,857 Just gotta break them in. 738 00:34:28,024 --> 00:34:29,358 Now. 739 00:34:29,526 --> 00:34:30,776 (WHISTLES) 740 00:34:35,282 --> 00:34:36,741 Come away! 741 00:34:36,908 --> 00:34:38,367 Dash away! 742 00:34:51,757 --> 00:34:53,048 Look, Arthur. 743 00:34:53,800 --> 00:34:55,050 All those stars. 744 00:34:55,218 --> 00:34:56,761 We're one of them now. 745 00:34:56,928 --> 00:34:59,847 A shooting star! Whoa! 746 00:35:01,641 --> 00:35:04,101 Stuck that there for your dad when he was a boy. 747 00:35:04,269 --> 00:35:06,353 Dad? What, he sat here? 748 00:35:06,521 --> 00:35:07,772 So did I. 749 00:35:07,939 --> 00:35:11,317 Every young heir to the Pole gets took out by his father. 750 00:35:11,485 --> 00:35:14,487 Right back to Saint Nick. 751 00:35:16,031 --> 00:35:17,865 We Clauses used to be the only men 752 00:35:18,033 --> 00:35:20,576 in the world who could fly, Arthur, 753 00:35:20,744 --> 00:35:22,369 and see all this. 754 00:35:22,537 --> 00:35:27,875 It was a gift, a great big ball wrapped in oceans and mountains. 755 00:35:28,502 --> 00:35:31,879 I remember the look on your father's face when he saw it. 756 00:35:33,757 --> 00:35:34,423 Yah! 757 00:36:09,376 --> 00:36:10,709 Fish! 758 00:36:11,628 --> 00:36:13,337 With horns! 759 00:36:13,505 --> 00:36:14,338 (GRANDSANTA LAUGHS) 760 00:36:14,923 --> 00:36:16,382 Want to help me make a snowman? 761 00:36:16,550 --> 00:36:17,299 Yah! No! Not ye...! 762 00:36:18,844 --> 00:36:21,262 Aah! Aah! Oh, where's the seat belt? 763 00:36:23,557 --> 00:36:24,807 (ARTHUR GRUNTING) 764 00:36:28,770 --> 00:36:29,520 Whoa! 765 00:36:30,856 --> 00:36:31,939 Whoo-hoo! 766 00:36:32,983 --> 00:36:34,608 (GRUNTS) 767 00:36:34,818 --> 00:36:37,653 Could Dad do that? Did he make a snowman for Steve? 768 00:36:37,821 --> 00:36:39,196 Robot Roy? 769 00:36:39,364 --> 00:36:40,698 Ha! I should cocoa. 770 00:36:40,866 --> 00:36:43,701 The next Santa, and he's never even sat in a sleigh. 771 00:36:43,869 --> 00:36:45,035 Oi! 772 00:36:46,830 --> 00:36:49,498 Is that...? The map of the Clauses. 773 00:36:49,749 --> 00:36:52,459 Used every Christmas night in history. 774 00:36:52,752 --> 00:36:55,254 Whatever your brother says, Arthur, 775 00:36:55,422 --> 00:36:58,090 it's the same old world. 776 00:36:59,759 --> 00:37:00,926 (BOTH SCREAM) 777 00:37:03,763 --> 00:37:04,555 ARTHUR: What is it?! 778 00:37:04,723 --> 00:37:05,806 No idea. I've never 779 00:37:05,974 --> 00:37:07,016 seen it before. 780 00:37:07,183 --> 00:37:08,601 ARTHUR: It's a city! A new one? 781 00:37:08,768 --> 00:37:10,477 Ruddy cheek. They're always putting 782 00:37:10,645 --> 00:37:11,312 these things up. 783 00:37:12,022 --> 00:37:13,480 I remember the first time 784 00:37:13,648 --> 00:37:15,649 I ran into Chicago. Ha, ha. 785 00:37:15,817 --> 00:37:17,109 Chicago wasn't on the map? 786 00:37:17,277 --> 00:37:17,985 GRANDSANTA: Whoa! 787 00:37:19,070 --> 00:37:20,029 Now, where are we? 788 00:37:21,197 --> 00:37:22,239 Ah. Here we are, see? 789 00:37:22,949 --> 00:37:24,450 Oh, no, that's Peking. 790 00:37:24,951 --> 00:37:25,868 Ahead, there's a...! 791 00:37:26,494 --> 00:37:27,161 GRANDSANTA: Whoa! 792 00:37:28,914 --> 00:37:29,830 ARTHUR: They can see us. 793 00:37:30,874 --> 00:37:32,458 Well, pull the camouflage lever. 794 00:37:33,168 --> 00:37:34,335 Now, then, we'd better 795 00:37:34,502 --> 00:37:35,544 draw in a few 796 00:37:35,712 --> 00:37:36,921 sky scratchers. Just, uh... 797 00:37:37,839 --> 00:37:38,631 Not that one. 798 00:37:38,798 --> 00:37:41,842 That's a steam train, you ninny. 799 00:37:42,010 --> 00:37:42,676 ARTHUR: Do this one. 800 00:37:44,137 --> 00:37:45,679 GRANDSANTA: So, what do they call this place? 801 00:37:47,849 --> 00:37:49,558 "Toronto." 802 00:37:49,726 --> 00:37:50,976 Toronto's in Canada. 803 00:37:51,144 --> 00:37:53,312 The Santas always come through Canada. 804 00:37:54,439 --> 00:37:55,856 Nobody lives here. 805 00:37:56,024 --> 00:37:56,941 It's nice and quiet. 806 00:37:59,027 --> 00:38:00,527 Till your brother came with 807 00:38:00,695 --> 00:38:03,572 his "You can't cut through Saigon, there's a war" rubbish. 808 00:38:03,740 --> 00:38:05,240 Don't need him to tell me what's ahead. 809 00:38:05,408 --> 00:38:06,492 I got eyes. Grandsanta! 810 00:38:12,999 --> 00:38:13,999 Ye baubles, an elf. 811 00:38:14,167 --> 00:38:15,876 Bryony Shelfley. Oh! There's 812 00:38:16,044 --> 00:38:17,753 a small trauma to your giftwrap, 813 00:38:17,921 --> 00:38:19,129 but I can fix it. 814 00:38:19,297 --> 00:38:20,923 A stowaway! I can wrap anything, 815 00:38:21,091 --> 00:38:24,009 sir, with three bits of sticky tape. Three! 816 00:38:24,177 --> 00:38:25,803 Good. Wrap yourself a parachute. 817 00:38:25,971 --> 00:38:26,804 Aah! Grandsanta! 818 00:38:30,558 --> 00:38:32,559 BRYONY: Aah! GRANDSANTA: Whoops. 819 00:38:36,731 --> 00:38:38,232 (RADAR BEEPING) 820 00:38:40,568 --> 00:38:42,611 Toronto. Present and correct. 821 00:38:42,779 --> 00:38:46,407 Not quite, sir. You've lost one of the reindeer. 822 00:38:48,493 --> 00:38:49,952 (♪♪♪) 823 00:38:55,417 --> 00:38:56,250 Quantitative... 824 00:38:56,418 --> 00:38:57,126 (HOHO CHIMES) 825 00:38:57,419 --> 00:38:58,252 Hello? 826 00:38:58,420 --> 00:39:00,295 What elf? PETER: Bryony Shelfley, sir. 827 00:39:00,463 --> 00:39:02,339 The crazy wrapping elf, you know? 828 00:39:02,507 --> 00:39:06,760 Security tracked her to Sector 19. And we think Arthur was here. 829 00:39:06,928 --> 00:39:08,178 Arthur? 830 00:39:08,346 --> 00:39:10,180 Who else leaves the door open, huh, sir? 831 00:39:10,807 --> 00:39:13,142 The old sleigh barn? That was sealed up 832 00:39:13,309 --> 00:39:14,351 decades ago 833 00:39:14,519 --> 00:39:18,188 after that terrible night Grandsanta sneaked out and... 834 00:39:18,898 --> 00:39:22,151 Thank goodness he's too old these days to get into trouble. 835 00:39:22,902 --> 00:39:23,902 (ARTHUR GRUNTING) 836 00:39:24,070 --> 00:39:25,112 (THUDDING) 837 00:39:25,363 --> 00:39:28,115 Bash it with a brick, Arthur. Go on. 838 00:39:28,742 --> 00:39:30,075 ARTHUR: It just won't... 839 00:39:30,618 --> 00:39:32,369 Grab its antlers and tug. 840 00:39:32,537 --> 00:39:36,123 I may just be a wrapping operative, sir, but this contravenes. 841 00:39:36,291 --> 00:39:39,334 MAN (ON HOHO): Seventeen. Specific mission regulations. 842 00:39:39,502 --> 00:39:41,962 I'm in charge here, not Billy the Bureaucrat. 843 00:39:42,130 --> 00:39:43,130 ARTHUR: It's stuck. 844 00:39:45,800 --> 00:39:46,925 GRANDSANTA: Shh! 845 00:39:47,385 --> 00:39:48,052 Eighteen. 846 00:39:48,511 --> 00:39:50,554 Elf, wrap your head. Sir! 847 00:39:50,722 --> 00:39:52,598 Come on, lad. You're as much use 848 00:39:52,766 --> 00:39:54,099 as a cheese chopstick. 849 00:39:55,268 --> 00:39:56,185 Got it! 850 00:39:56,352 --> 00:39:57,019 (GASPS) 851 00:39:57,187 --> 00:39:58,187 Oh, no. 852 00:39:58,646 --> 00:39:59,521 (BRYONY MUMBLING INDISTINCTLY) 853 00:39:59,939 --> 00:40:02,274 Oh, my big Aunt Betty. 854 00:40:02,484 --> 00:40:04,443 It'll have to do. Pass it down. 855 00:40:04,611 --> 00:40:05,444 What? 856 00:40:05,612 --> 00:40:09,907 Permission to breathe, sir. I have about nine seconds left before I black out. 857 00:40:10,408 --> 00:40:11,200 One breath. 858 00:40:11,367 --> 00:40:12,701 (GASPS) 859 00:40:13,453 --> 00:40:14,286 BRYONY: Sir? 860 00:40:14,454 --> 00:40:16,580 I said one. Hurry up, Arthur. 861 00:40:18,374 --> 00:40:19,792 But don't we need a whole one? 862 00:40:19,959 --> 00:40:21,335 You know, 863 00:40:21,503 --> 00:40:22,920 to balance the sleigh? 864 00:40:23,129 --> 00:40:27,132 Oh, it won't balance the sleigh. No, no. If anything, it'll slow us down. 865 00:40:27,342 --> 00:40:28,467 (BRYONY MUMBLING INDISTINCTLY) 866 00:40:28,635 --> 00:40:30,385 So why are we taking it? 867 00:40:31,096 --> 00:40:35,390 It's for Gwen. Eight beautiful reindeer. That's what she's dreaming of. 868 00:40:35,558 --> 00:40:37,684 The jingly bells, the sleigh on the roof. 869 00:40:37,894 --> 00:40:39,937 Yeah, but... That's what the kids want, 870 00:40:40,105 --> 00:40:42,272 not some spaceship. 871 00:40:42,440 --> 00:40:44,691 We're giving her the star treatment. 872 00:40:44,859 --> 00:40:45,901 What now? 873 00:40:46,319 --> 00:40:48,403 We have a waker, sir. 874 00:40:48,571 --> 00:40:49,655 With a gun! 875 00:40:50,031 --> 00:40:50,697 (GUNSHOT) 876 00:40:51,199 --> 00:40:52,116 GRANDSANTA: That's it, lad. 877 00:40:52,283 --> 00:40:53,075 You distract him! 878 00:40:53,243 --> 00:40:54,743 ARTHUR: Grandsanta! MAN: Who's there? 879 00:40:55,411 --> 00:40:56,703 ARTHUR: Uh... Uh... Uh... 880 00:40:57,831 --> 00:41:00,082 We come in peace. 881 00:41:00,291 --> 00:41:01,917 Our craft has to 882 00:41:02,085 --> 00:41:05,379 travel around the world in less than an hour! 883 00:41:05,547 --> 00:41:06,338 (GUNSHOT) 884 00:41:09,008 --> 00:41:11,051 We need a sign for our slei... 885 00:41:12,137 --> 00:41:13,011 Craft. 886 00:41:14,430 --> 00:41:16,014 Sorry I can't pay you. Where I 887 00:41:16,182 --> 00:41:17,224 come from, we don't have 888 00:41:17,392 --> 00:41:18,976 money! 889 00:41:21,938 --> 00:41:23,397 (♪♪♪) 890 00:41:30,780 --> 00:41:32,865 GRANDSANTA: Christmas 1923, 891 00:41:33,032 --> 00:41:36,743 had a heart attack at the reins. Left ventricle popped out me mouth. 892 00:41:36,911 --> 00:41:38,662 Pushed it back down and carried on! 893 00:41:38,830 --> 00:41:40,664 (GRANDSANTA & ARTHUR CHUCKLE) 894 00:41:41,040 --> 00:41:44,418 It's big, isn't it, the Atlantic? Think we should stop and ask someone? 895 00:41:44,919 --> 00:41:47,254 Pishywibble, we're nearly there! 896 00:41:47,422 --> 00:41:50,424 See, I take the North Star there 897 00:41:50,592 --> 00:41:53,927 as a fixed point. Then I plot my bearings from, um... 898 00:41:54,095 --> 00:41:55,137 That's a plane, sir. 899 00:41:55,305 --> 00:41:57,806 Insubordination. I'll have you harpooned, elf. 900 00:41:58,016 --> 00:42:00,142 ARTHUR: I thought it would be chillier near England. 901 00:42:00,310 --> 00:42:01,560 GRANDSANTA: Globular warming. 902 00:42:02,145 --> 00:42:06,148 Ha! Land ahoy! There it is. Told you! 903 00:42:09,068 --> 00:42:10,068 ARTHUR: Whoa, whoa, whoa! 904 00:42:10,945 --> 00:42:12,738 GRANDSANTA: There you are. Down. ARTHUR: Watch that rock! 905 00:42:12,989 --> 00:42:14,031 GRANDSANTA: There you go. 906 00:42:14,282 --> 00:42:15,616 Ah. 907 00:42:16,451 --> 00:42:17,743 (DASHER WHIMPERS) 908 00:42:18,870 --> 00:42:20,162 ARTHUR: Wow. 909 00:42:20,705 --> 00:42:21,955 England. 910 00:42:22,165 --> 00:42:22,956 (YELLS) 911 00:42:23,541 --> 00:42:26,460 Maybe we pulled to the right a bit. We're a reindeer short. 912 00:42:26,628 --> 00:42:27,711 France. 913 00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:30,422 (SPEAKING IN FRENCH) 914 00:42:30,590 --> 00:42:31,506 (ELEPHANT TRUMPETS) 915 00:42:32,717 --> 00:42:34,635 They have elephants in France? 916 00:42:34,844 --> 00:42:38,472 The odd stray. They breed in the drains. This way. 917 00:42:39,307 --> 00:42:41,516 (GRANDSANTA SPEAKING IN SPANISH) 918 00:42:46,231 --> 00:42:47,856 Paris Zoo. 919 00:42:49,984 --> 00:42:50,651 BRYONY: Then this is 920 00:42:50,818 --> 00:42:52,110 where they keep the lions! 921 00:42:53,863 --> 00:42:54,696 GRANDSANTA: They won't eat me. 922 00:42:55,490 --> 00:42:57,074 I'm Santa! 923 00:42:57,242 --> 00:42:58,116 Lie down! 924 00:42:58,284 --> 00:42:58,951 Oh, right. 925 00:42:59,118 --> 00:43:00,160 Call the keeper! 926 00:43:00,328 --> 00:43:01,078 ARTHUR: How old is this? 927 00:43:01,246 --> 00:43:02,037 "Atlantis"? 928 00:43:02,205 --> 00:43:03,830 "Here be cannibals"? 929 00:43:03,998 --> 00:43:05,123 Watch out for cannibals. 930 00:43:05,291 --> 00:43:05,958 (ALL YELL) 931 00:43:06,125 --> 00:43:07,417 (BRYONY WHIMPERS) 932 00:43:07,627 --> 00:43:09,169 This isn't France, is it? 933 00:43:09,379 --> 00:43:10,963 Technically, it's known as Africa. Aah! 934 00:43:11,130 --> 00:43:13,215 Serengeti National Park, Tanzania. 935 00:43:13,383 --> 00:43:14,967 How can you possibly be sure? 936 00:43:15,134 --> 00:43:16,218 The GPS on my HOHO. 937 00:43:16,844 --> 00:43:17,511 Take her! 938 00:43:17,887 --> 00:43:18,637 Take the elf! 939 00:43:18,805 --> 00:43:20,305 GPS? Why didn't you say? 940 00:43:20,473 --> 00:43:24,726 I'm a wrapping elf. I don't navigate, I wrap. I use it to store pictures of bows. 941 00:43:24,894 --> 00:43:29,273 She's right. You brought us to Africa! I've seen it on a stamp. 942 00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:30,315 (ROARING) 943 00:43:30,900 --> 00:43:33,986 I'm too young to die, Arthur. 944 00:43:34,153 --> 00:43:36,029 Do something. Arthur! 945 00:43:41,619 --> 00:43:45,122 STEVE: The old sleigh. What is happening here? 946 00:43:45,290 --> 00:43:47,916 Was supposed to be chopped up for firewood decades ago. 947 00:43:48,084 --> 00:43:49,001 How did that devious...? 948 00:43:49,168 --> 00:43:50,085 Old people, sir. 949 00:43:50,253 --> 00:43:52,713 Shall I get you your stress ball? 950 00:43:52,880 --> 00:43:53,922 We have finer 951 00:43:54,090 --> 00:43:56,174 comms than the Pentagon, and you say 952 00:43:56,342 --> 00:43:58,677 we can't contact him except by some ancient... 953 00:43:58,845 --> 00:44:00,595 ERNIE: Toodle-loo! 954 00:44:01,139 --> 00:44:02,848 Here comes the cavalry! 955 00:44:03,016 --> 00:44:04,891 Ernie Clicker, sir. 956 00:44:05,059 --> 00:44:10,105 Head of Polar Communications for 46 missions! 957 00:44:10,273 --> 00:44:12,316 Oh, crikey blikey, 958 00:44:12,483 --> 00:44:15,235 me and your granddad saw some times! 959 00:44:15,403 --> 00:44:19,072 I remember once... Wow, must catch up soon. Now... 960 00:44:19,615 --> 00:44:23,827 Oh, you're in a hurry. I can tell. 961 00:44:25,288 --> 00:44:26,163 (BOTH COUGH) 962 00:44:27,832 --> 00:44:30,542 Oh, this is ridiculous. Could we hurry this? 963 00:44:30,710 --> 00:44:34,504 Ooh... You can't rush the Signalator. 964 00:44:34,672 --> 00:44:36,548 Got to play her gentle. 965 00:44:37,800 --> 00:44:40,552 So, what do you wish to say? 966 00:44:40,762 --> 00:44:45,182 I wouldn't worry. It's not like they're facing man-eating lions. 967 00:44:45,641 --> 00:44:46,308 (LIONS ROARING) 968 00:44:48,019 --> 00:44:53,357 ♪ Silent night Holy night ♪ 969 00:44:54,317 --> 00:44:56,818 ♪ All is calm ♪ 970 00:44:56,986 --> 00:44:57,652 (SCREAMS) 971 00:44:58,154 --> 00:44:59,905 ♪ All is ♪ 972 00:45:00,073 --> 00:45:01,156 ♪ Bright ♪ 973 00:45:01,449 --> 00:45:03,158 ♪ I realize ♪ 974 00:45:03,326 --> 00:45:05,619 ♪ This is mental But it's all ♪ 975 00:45:06,371 --> 00:45:07,829 ♪ That I know ♪ 976 00:45:09,040 --> 00:45:11,249 ♪ It's Christmas ♪ 977 00:45:11,417 --> 00:45:12,793 ♪ Nice kitty ♪ 978 00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:15,587 ♪ So please let us go ♪ 979 00:45:16,756 --> 00:45:18,715 ALL: ♪ Sleep in ♪ 980 00:45:18,883 --> 00:45:23,428 ♪ Heavenly peace ♪ 981 00:45:24,722 --> 00:45:26,890 ♪ Sleep in ♪ 982 00:45:27,058 --> 00:45:30,268 ♪ Heavenly peace ♪ ♪ 983 00:45:31,729 --> 00:45:33,229 (DEVICE CLATTERS AND RINGS) 984 00:45:34,357 --> 00:45:35,899 (LIONS GROWL THEN ROAR) 985 00:45:37,110 --> 00:45:38,110 (ALL SCREAMING) 986 00:45:41,239 --> 00:45:41,905 GRANDSANTA: Dash! 987 00:45:43,658 --> 00:45:45,075 (ALL SCREAM) 988 00:45:46,285 --> 00:45:47,953 Something's coming through. 989 00:45:48,121 --> 00:45:49,538 What does it say? 990 00:45:49,705 --> 00:45:51,998 (SPEAKS GIBBERISH) 991 00:45:53,626 --> 00:45:56,044 GRANDSANTA: Get off! No! 992 00:45:56,212 --> 00:45:57,754 That's me Evie, you mangy moron! 993 00:45:59,924 --> 00:46:00,590 ARTHUR: No! 994 00:46:00,758 --> 00:46:01,800 That's Gwen's gift! 995 00:46:01,968 --> 00:46:02,634 Hi-yah! 996 00:46:03,302 --> 00:46:06,179 Only children get to tear the wrapping. 997 00:46:06,347 --> 00:46:07,180 Bryony? 998 00:46:07,432 --> 00:46:10,142 Automatic tape guns! GRANDSANTA: Down, doggy! 999 00:46:10,309 --> 00:46:11,393 Bad doggy! 1000 00:46:11,561 --> 00:46:13,145 Laser-guided scissors! 1001 00:46:14,689 --> 00:46:16,231 Oh, no, no! 1002 00:46:17,817 --> 00:46:19,526 Standard-issue giftwrap! 1003 00:46:19,735 --> 00:46:20,485 No time for a bow! 1004 00:46:20,653 --> 00:46:22,446 There's always time for a bow! 1005 00:46:22,947 --> 00:46:23,613 ARTHUR: Oh! 1006 00:46:23,865 --> 00:46:25,365 GRANDSANTA: I can't look. 1007 00:46:26,701 --> 00:46:27,534 Not that knob! 1008 00:46:27,994 --> 00:46:28,660 Good night! 1009 00:46:28,828 --> 00:46:29,995 Oh, no! 1010 00:46:31,247 --> 00:46:32,247 ARTHUR: Something else! 1011 00:46:32,707 --> 00:46:35,083 No, leave it! Don't... Aah. 1012 00:46:36,210 --> 00:46:37,961 My camera! 1013 00:46:38,254 --> 00:46:38,920 (SCREAMS) 1014 00:46:41,340 --> 00:46:42,257 (ROARS THEN CATERWAULS) 1015 00:46:45,178 --> 00:46:45,844 (ALL SCREAMING) 1016 00:46:51,392 --> 00:46:52,392 Wait! Look! 1017 00:46:55,021 --> 00:46:56,146 Oi! 1018 00:47:12,163 --> 00:47:13,371 (ELEPHANT TRUMPETING) 1019 00:47:13,539 --> 00:47:14,831 (LION ROARS) 1020 00:47:17,293 --> 00:47:18,835 BRYONY: Whoo-hoo-hoo! 1021 00:47:19,003 --> 00:47:20,045 Wow. 1022 00:47:28,971 --> 00:47:29,679 Whoa! 1023 00:47:30,139 --> 00:47:31,264 GRANDSANTA: What's so funny? 1024 00:47:31,641 --> 00:47:33,433 Look what they've done to my Evie. 1025 00:47:34,227 --> 00:47:36,603 And the map. But it's okay. 1026 00:47:36,771 --> 00:47:37,854 We've got this. Look! 1027 00:47:38,022 --> 00:47:40,524 Mimosa Avenue, Trelew. 1028 00:47:40,691 --> 00:47:42,400 MAN (ON HOHO): Proceed to the highlighted route. 1029 00:47:42,568 --> 00:47:44,486 What's the point? Look at us. 1030 00:47:44,654 --> 00:47:46,488 And my camera, totally banjaxed. 1031 00:47:46,656 --> 00:47:48,740 How do I get my picture now? 1032 00:47:48,950 --> 00:47:50,033 What picture? 1033 00:47:50,201 --> 00:47:52,702 The sleigh on the roof, the eight beautiful reindeer 1034 00:47:52,870 --> 00:47:54,120 and Santa... Me! 1035 00:47:54,288 --> 00:47:56,039 ...going down the "chimbley." 1036 00:47:56,541 --> 00:47:58,375 That's what I wanted them to see. 1037 00:47:58,543 --> 00:48:02,128 They missed the kid, but I got there. My way. 1038 00:48:03,756 --> 00:48:07,676 That's why you came. Not for Gwen. 1039 00:48:09,762 --> 00:48:12,764 1368 miles, then slight left. 1040 00:48:14,559 --> 00:48:16,017 For the love of Lulu, 1041 00:48:16,185 --> 00:48:18,645 bossed about by Tinpot Tom. 1042 00:48:19,063 --> 00:48:19,729 Dash! 1043 00:48:21,399 --> 00:48:23,108 Try them again. Keep trying. 1044 00:48:23,276 --> 00:48:25,777 All this for one child. In 600 million. 1045 00:48:25,945 --> 00:48:27,946 We should turn her off a mo. 1046 00:48:28,114 --> 00:48:29,823 Don't worry, sir. Children are 1047 00:48:29,991 --> 00:48:32,200 stupid. Either it won't know it got missed 1048 00:48:32,368 --> 00:48:34,995 or it'll think it's been bad. It's a win-win. 1049 00:48:35,162 --> 00:48:36,955 You missed one? 1050 00:48:37,123 --> 00:48:38,456 A nipper? Cor! 1051 00:48:38,624 --> 00:48:42,460 Ha, ha. What's all this here for if you miss one? 1052 00:48:42,670 --> 00:48:44,170 Could you please type faster? 1053 00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:46,256 All right. 1054 00:48:47,717 --> 00:48:49,301 COMPUTER: Systems critical. 1055 00:48:49,468 --> 00:48:50,302 Lead in Christmas. 1056 00:48:57,226 --> 00:48:58,602 ERNIE: Oops-a-daisy. 1057 00:48:58,769 --> 00:49:00,061 STEVE: Peter, 1058 00:49:00,605 --> 00:49:02,314 let go of my hand, please. 1059 00:49:02,481 --> 00:49:04,274 PETER: Yes, sir. Sorry, sir. 1060 00:49:05,151 --> 00:49:06,818 And get me IT. 1061 00:49:07,778 --> 00:49:08,612 (♪♪♪) 1062 00:49:10,865 --> 00:49:12,365 MAN (ON HOHO): Descend 1000 feet. 1063 00:49:14,994 --> 00:49:17,871 You are at your destination. ARTHUR: Yes! 1064 00:49:18,039 --> 00:49:19,706 We did it, we did it! We did it! Hooray! 1065 00:49:20,666 --> 00:49:21,916 Whoopee-doo. 1066 00:49:22,710 --> 00:49:23,543 In 100 yards, 1067 00:49:23,878 --> 00:49:24,711 turn left. 1068 00:49:25,379 --> 00:49:28,423 Straight ahead, left, right. You are at your client's dwelling. 1069 00:49:28,591 --> 00:49:29,424 Whoa, whoa! Hey, steady! 1070 00:49:35,806 --> 00:49:38,016 We made it. I survived! 1071 00:49:39,518 --> 00:49:43,480 I'll walk home, I'll get a boat, but I am never getting back 1072 00:49:43,648 --> 00:49:47,400 in that crazy flying death trap ever again! 1073 00:49:47,568 --> 00:49:48,902 (BICYCLE BELL RINGS) 1074 00:49:49,236 --> 00:49:49,903 GRANDSANTA: Go on. 1075 00:49:50,321 --> 00:49:51,696 Get it over. 1076 00:49:51,864 --> 00:49:53,156 I want my bed. 1077 00:49:54,617 --> 00:49:55,909 What, you're not coming? 1078 00:49:59,080 --> 00:50:00,747 You have to deliver the present. 1079 00:50:01,374 --> 00:50:03,124 You've got your special coat on. 1080 00:50:03,334 --> 00:50:04,793 You're our Santa. 1081 00:50:04,960 --> 00:50:08,046 I said me and Evie could get here, and we did. 1082 00:50:08,214 --> 00:50:10,548 The rest is just elf work. 1083 00:50:10,716 --> 00:50:12,801 Go on, Festive Freddie, 1084 00:50:12,968 --> 00:50:14,302 sling your hook. 1085 00:50:17,973 --> 00:50:20,350 It doesn't matter how we got here. 1086 00:50:20,518 --> 00:50:25,063 The sleigh on the roof, the jingle bells, the eight reindeer. 1087 00:50:25,314 --> 00:50:27,857 Gwen would never have seen that. 1088 00:50:31,987 --> 00:50:32,987 (♪♪♪) 1089 00:50:45,751 --> 00:50:46,459 (ARTHUR SIGHS) 1090 00:50:46,919 --> 00:50:48,586 ARTHUR (WHISPERS): I wish Dad could see this. 1091 00:50:49,422 --> 00:50:51,715 It would take such a load off his mind. 1092 00:50:51,882 --> 00:50:54,175 (WHISPERS) So, what are your orders? 1093 00:50:54,343 --> 00:50:55,385 Hmm? 1094 00:50:55,845 --> 00:50:58,722 You're a Claus. You give the orders. 1095 00:50:58,889 --> 00:51:01,558 Do I? Oh! Um... Heh. 1096 00:51:01,726 --> 00:51:05,061 I'm just happy being an elf, really. You know, just part of it all. 1097 00:51:05,354 --> 00:51:06,229 (SIGHS) 1098 00:51:06,731 --> 00:51:08,940 You want to order me to go through the cat flap? 1099 00:51:09,108 --> 00:51:11,192 Oh! Um... Yes, that's a great idea. 1100 00:51:13,154 --> 00:51:15,280 Do you want to tell me to let you in? 1101 00:51:15,448 --> 00:51:17,323 Brilliant. Thank you, Bryony. 1102 00:51:18,367 --> 00:51:19,242 (ALARM BEEPS) 1103 00:51:19,493 --> 00:51:20,618 BRYONY: And do you want to...? 1104 00:51:20,786 --> 00:51:23,204 Quick! The alarm? Definitely, yes. 1105 00:51:27,960 --> 00:51:29,961 (♪♪♪) 1106 00:51:55,863 --> 00:51:56,654 Is this 1107 00:51:56,822 --> 00:51:58,031 your first time? 1108 00:52:13,547 --> 00:52:14,964 (BRYONY GASPS) 1109 00:52:15,800 --> 00:52:16,966 (GASPS) 1110 00:52:18,135 --> 00:52:19,302 But... 1111 00:52:22,181 --> 00:52:23,431 (♪♪♪) 1112 00:52:28,437 --> 00:52:29,479 Bryony? 1113 00:52:30,773 --> 00:52:31,898 (ALARM WAILING) 1114 00:52:32,608 --> 00:52:33,274 (BARKING) 1115 00:52:35,444 --> 00:52:36,110 Sorry. 1116 00:52:36,278 --> 00:52:39,072 He likes these slippers even more than you do! 1117 00:52:46,247 --> 00:52:47,664 Happy Christmas. 1118 00:52:49,583 --> 00:52:51,292 BRYONY (IN NORMAL VOICE): When you put the address into 1119 00:52:51,460 --> 00:52:52,836 the HOHO, what did you see? 1120 00:52:53,003 --> 00:52:55,713 (IN NORMAL VOICE) A list of Trelews. I just clicked on the first one! 1121 00:52:55,881 --> 00:52:58,466 Which was not Trelew, England. 1122 00:52:58,634 --> 00:52:59,759 We're in the wrong Trelew! 1123 00:52:59,927 --> 00:53:00,760 (POLICE SIRENS WAILING) 1124 00:53:02,763 --> 00:53:04,347 (♪♪♪) 1125 00:53:06,725 --> 00:53:08,184 What's going on?! 1126 00:53:09,019 --> 00:53:12,063 They've been watching us. They've seen Evie. 1127 00:53:12,439 --> 00:53:15,316 It's just like last time. REPORTER: Governments tonight 1128 00:53:15,484 --> 00:53:18,778 are waking to news of a UFO traveling the globe at incredible speed. 1129 00:53:18,946 --> 00:53:20,196 BRYONY: That's us! The clearest 1130 00:53:20,364 --> 00:53:22,532 sighting was at this tractor dealership 1131 00:53:22,700 --> 00:53:24,617 in Idaho. Had eyeballs on its feet 1132 00:53:24,785 --> 00:53:28,413 and a pointy little head. It asked me for a sign. 1133 00:53:28,622 --> 00:53:30,874 BRYONY: We're on the news. REPORTER: From the trail in Toronto, 1134 00:53:31,041 --> 00:53:33,918 these beings do not appear friendly. COMPUTER: Rebooting. 1135 00:53:34,920 --> 00:53:36,421 We are online, sir. WOMAN 1: This is 1136 00:53:36,589 --> 00:53:37,714 Charlotte. Mexican 1137 00:53:37,882 --> 00:53:39,007 police found a furry thing 1138 00:53:39,174 --> 00:53:41,050 trying to mate with a dog. MAN 1: I have calls 1139 00:53:41,218 --> 00:53:42,844 reporting a steam train flying around. 1140 00:53:43,012 --> 00:53:44,804 MAN 2: Steam train? Been on the eggnog? 1141 00:53:44,972 --> 00:53:47,599 MAN 3: It's gone black over Mexico. This thing's going faster 1142 00:53:47,766 --> 00:53:49,142 than anything we know of. 1143 00:53:49,310 --> 00:53:51,185 STEVE: No. The herd is now in 1144 00:53:51,353 --> 00:53:54,022 Mozambique's airspace, threatening the fragile peace 1145 00:53:54,189 --> 00:53:55,440 between the two nations. 1146 00:53:55,649 --> 00:53:59,027 Two billion items delivered, and we didn't leave a footprint in the snow. 1147 00:53:59,194 --> 00:54:00,361 And now... DOUG: Sir? 1148 00:54:00,529 --> 00:54:03,114 We have lost 80 percent of our data. 1149 00:54:03,324 --> 00:54:05,074 No, no. We have 18 pulse 1150 00:54:05,242 --> 00:54:09,579 data reservoirs of a trillion terabytes! Sorry, autosave was off. 1151 00:54:09,747 --> 00:54:11,456 Shall I slap him, sir? Quite hard? 1152 00:54:11,624 --> 00:54:12,290 DEBORAH: Sir, 1153 00:54:12,458 --> 00:54:14,709 there's a polar bear on Level 6. 1154 00:54:14,877 --> 00:54:17,170 Sir? Why is Arthur out there? 1155 00:54:18,130 --> 00:54:19,297 ERNIE: He missed one. 1156 00:54:19,465 --> 00:54:20,506 A nipper. 1157 00:54:21,050 --> 00:54:22,133 I mean, 1158 00:54:22,301 --> 00:54:24,677 47785BXK. 1159 00:54:24,845 --> 00:54:26,137 (ALL GASP) 1160 00:54:26,764 --> 00:54:27,764 (BARKING) 1161 00:54:28,098 --> 00:54:29,849 Sir, we've got something. 1162 00:54:30,017 --> 00:54:32,560 Bryony Shelfley, it's her HOHO. 1163 00:54:37,274 --> 00:54:38,566 We can still get there. 1164 00:54:38,734 --> 00:54:42,070 We just have to go faster, higher! You've changed your tune. 1165 00:54:42,237 --> 00:54:43,112 I'm not going anywhere. 1166 00:54:43,864 --> 00:54:44,656 I'm not here! 1167 00:54:45,074 --> 00:54:47,283 ARTHUR: I've taped myself in! Grandsanta! 1168 00:54:47,576 --> 00:54:48,743 Leave me. It's that 1169 00:54:48,911 --> 00:54:50,536 terrible night all over again. 1170 00:54:50,704 --> 00:54:51,621 What night? 1171 00:54:51,789 --> 00:54:53,373 Last time I took Evie for a spin. 1172 00:54:53,791 --> 00:54:54,540 I didn't know 1173 00:54:54,708 --> 00:54:58,503 it was the Cuban missile crisis! I nearly started World War III. 1174 00:55:00,547 --> 00:55:02,382 BRYONY: Hold still. Someone has to drive. 1175 00:55:04,093 --> 00:55:04,801 Whoopsie! 1176 00:55:05,511 --> 00:55:06,219 ARTHUR: Oh, no! 1177 00:55:06,428 --> 00:55:07,136 Fencer! 1178 00:55:07,304 --> 00:55:08,346 Mincer! Come back! 1179 00:55:08,514 --> 00:55:09,180 (SIRENS WAILING) 1180 00:55:10,099 --> 00:55:10,765 Bryony! 1181 00:55:11,767 --> 00:55:12,850 BRYONY: Hi-yah! 1182 00:55:13,435 --> 00:55:14,268 (ARTHUR SCREAMS) 1183 00:55:16,188 --> 00:55:16,980 ARTHUR: Grandsanta, 1184 00:55:17,147 --> 00:55:17,814 get here! 1185 00:55:17,982 --> 00:55:20,441 Oi! That's me new hip. 1186 00:55:20,693 --> 00:55:23,403 Please, I'll read you Gwen's letter. 1187 00:55:23,570 --> 00:55:25,029 GRANDSANTA: Stone-deaf. I'm 136. 1188 00:55:25,197 --> 00:55:26,072 (HOHO CHIMES) 1189 00:55:26,240 --> 00:55:27,865 What's that? It's Steve. 1190 00:55:28,033 --> 00:55:29,117 Steve! GRANDSANTA: Tell him 1191 00:55:29,284 --> 00:55:30,118 I'm not here! 1192 00:55:30,285 --> 00:55:32,537 Grandsanta says he's not here. 1193 00:55:32,705 --> 00:55:35,456 Hi. I'm looking for a missing relic. 1194 00:55:35,624 --> 00:55:37,125 Steve, three words. 1195 00:55:37,292 --> 00:55:38,793 Is the first one "help"? ARTHUR: Yes. 1196 00:55:38,961 --> 00:55:40,628 You can help us, Steve! It was him! 1197 00:55:40,796 --> 00:55:42,922 Frosty the Madman. He forced me to come. 1198 00:55:43,090 --> 00:55:44,841 Elf, back me up if you want a career. 1199 00:55:45,009 --> 00:55:47,301 I forced you? You see? Look. 1200 00:55:47,469 --> 00:55:49,804 What did you want, Grandsanta? Let me guess. Hm. 1201 00:55:49,972 --> 00:55:52,598 A picture of you in the sleigh delivering the gift 1202 00:55:52,766 --> 00:55:54,851 to show me how it's really done? 1203 00:55:55,019 --> 00:55:55,685 No. 1204 00:55:55,853 --> 00:55:57,854 You know the picture they'll have tomorrow? 1205 00:55:58,022 --> 00:55:59,731 You, led away in handcuffs! 1206 00:55:59,898 --> 00:56:02,900 The Santa who was seen. By everybody on Earth. 1207 00:56:03,110 --> 00:56:05,069 The Santa who ruined Christmas. 1208 00:56:05,237 --> 00:56:06,154 Ruined it! 1209 00:56:06,321 --> 00:56:10,408 We'll fix this, Steve. We'll be back home in the wobble of a reindeer's buttocks. 1210 00:56:10,576 --> 00:56:14,412 And Evie can go back in mothballs. You can forget she ever existed. 1211 00:56:14,580 --> 00:56:17,582 You can't just go home. What about Gwen? 1212 00:56:17,750 --> 00:56:20,710 Gwen. For that, you'd threaten my whole operation? 1213 00:56:20,878 --> 00:56:24,172 Steve, you said if there was any way to get there, you would. 1214 00:56:24,339 --> 00:56:25,882 Well, this is it. Look. 1215 00:56:26,050 --> 00:56:27,383 The old sleigh is perfect! 1216 00:56:27,676 --> 00:56:31,888 Uh, right. Well, anyway, it goes really fast, even with bits missing. 1217 00:56:32,056 --> 00:56:34,140 And we've got quite a few reindeer left. 1218 00:56:34,308 --> 00:56:36,976 And, if I'm sick again, I could be sick in a bag. 1219 00:56:37,144 --> 00:56:38,728 I'll wrap him one. 1220 00:56:39,313 --> 00:56:40,229 We can help them. 1221 00:56:40,397 --> 00:56:41,522 No one missed, sir! 1222 00:56:41,690 --> 00:56:43,566 All correct presents, present and correct. 1223 00:56:44,485 --> 00:56:46,402 ARTHUR: If you help us, Steve, 1224 00:56:46,570 --> 00:56:47,862 we can do it! 1225 00:56:52,993 --> 00:56:54,535 THOMAS: Grandsanta and Arthur would be 1226 00:56:54,703 --> 00:56:56,871 the heroes of the night, sir! 1227 00:56:59,500 --> 00:57:01,292 Come home now! 1228 00:57:01,752 --> 00:57:03,002 If we all just gave in 1229 00:57:03,170 --> 00:57:05,129 to Christmas spirit, there'd be chaos. 1230 00:57:05,422 --> 00:57:07,673 Unh! We're on our way, Steve. No! 1231 00:57:08,175 --> 00:57:10,134 Santa will want us to get to Gwen. 1232 00:57:10,302 --> 00:57:12,345 Ask him. Please. 1233 00:57:12,513 --> 00:57:13,554 STEVE: Arthur, 1234 00:57:14,515 --> 00:57:16,974 this is Dad we're talking about. 1235 00:57:17,142 --> 00:57:20,978 There was a time when he cared about every last gift tag, but now 1236 00:57:21,146 --> 00:57:24,357 he just wants to be loved and get some rest. 1237 00:57:25,275 --> 00:57:29,987 No. He's lying awake, worrying his beard off about Gwen. 1238 00:57:30,531 --> 00:57:31,531 (LINE RINGS) 1239 00:57:31,698 --> 00:57:34,242 SANTA: Ho-ho-ho. Off to the land of nod. 1240 00:57:34,785 --> 00:57:37,370 Please do not disturb until December 26th. 1241 00:57:37,538 --> 00:57:38,704 Is that it, dear? MRS. SANTA: Yes. 1242 00:57:38,872 --> 00:57:39,580 Press the red... 1243 00:57:39,748 --> 00:57:40,832 (MACHINE BEEPS) 1244 00:57:42,000 --> 00:57:43,042 No. 1245 00:57:43,669 --> 00:57:46,254 Santa's the most caring man in the world. 1246 00:57:46,421 --> 00:57:50,007 So why are you here, not him? 1247 00:57:51,885 --> 00:57:53,052 (GRANDSANTA GRUNTS) 1248 00:57:53,637 --> 00:57:55,012 (ALL SCREAMING) 1249 00:57:56,473 --> 00:57:58,474 (ALL GRUNT) 1250 00:58:13,365 --> 00:58:15,074 Don't leave me, Arthur! 1251 00:58:15,284 --> 00:58:19,537 Poor old man and his reindeer, on our own at Christmas? 1252 00:58:20,080 --> 00:58:23,916 At least have the decency to finish us off with a rock! 1253 00:58:35,053 --> 00:58:37,054 (♪♪♪) 1254 00:58:59,328 --> 00:59:01,120 Poor Evie. 1255 00:59:04,499 --> 00:59:06,459 Sun'll be up soon. 1256 00:59:06,627 --> 00:59:08,502 It's Christmas! 1257 00:59:09,129 --> 00:59:12,423 Christmas is for kids. You grow out of it. 1258 00:59:12,591 --> 00:59:14,258 What, in the last six minutes? 1259 00:59:15,302 --> 00:59:18,054 I know what you all say about me, you know. 1260 00:59:18,263 --> 00:59:19,138 (SCOFFS) 1261 00:59:19,306 --> 00:59:22,016 (IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) "He belongs in the South Pole." 1262 00:59:22,517 --> 00:59:26,562 (IMITATING SANTA) "Dear Arthur, what a puzzle." 1263 00:59:26,772 --> 00:59:28,022 (♪♪♪) 1264 00:59:28,273 --> 00:59:29,815 (IN NORMAL VOICE) Well, you were right. 1265 00:59:30,484 --> 00:59:33,236 All that fuss over one kid. 1266 00:59:33,403 --> 00:59:36,030 I was being ridiculous. 1267 00:59:36,782 --> 00:59:37,490 (SIGHS) 1268 00:59:37,658 --> 00:59:39,450 This is nice. 1269 00:59:39,618 --> 00:59:42,453 It's good to get away from it all, you know. 1270 00:59:42,621 --> 00:59:44,622 All the Christmas fuss. 1271 00:59:50,003 --> 00:59:51,796 (GRUNTS) 1272 00:59:52,839 --> 00:59:56,467 I'm sorry I messed things up, lad. 1273 00:59:56,927 --> 00:59:58,094 You see, 1274 00:59:58,262 --> 01:00:01,931 the night I last took Evie out 1275 01:00:02,099 --> 01:00:05,184 when there was all that fuss, 1276 01:00:05,394 --> 01:00:07,478 your father came to me. 1277 01:00:07,646 --> 01:00:09,313 I'll never forget it. 1278 01:00:09,481 --> 01:00:11,565 Couldn't look me in the eye. 1279 01:00:11,775 --> 01:00:13,985 "Dad," he says. 1280 01:00:14,403 --> 01:00:17,947 "Steve thinks it best you don't fly again. 1281 01:00:19,324 --> 01:00:22,034 We're scrapping the sleigh." 1282 01:00:22,995 --> 01:00:25,079 Me own son 1283 01:00:25,747 --> 01:00:28,708 who used to sit where you sat, looking up at me. 1284 01:00:31,753 --> 01:00:34,964 I just wanted them to remember 1285 01:00:35,132 --> 01:00:37,341 who I used to be. 1286 01:00:39,344 --> 01:00:44,140 I was a bit like you, lad. Keen as cranberry. 1287 01:00:44,308 --> 01:00:46,642 So was your dad. 1288 01:00:47,269 --> 01:00:49,228 You get old, that's all. 1289 01:00:49,396 --> 01:00:52,273 Everything changes. 1290 01:00:52,441 --> 01:00:53,816 Does it? 1291 01:00:55,569 --> 01:01:00,156 How can I ever write another letter saying that Santa cares? 1292 01:01:00,365 --> 01:01:02,199 (♪♪♪) 1293 01:01:05,579 --> 01:01:07,413 (WAVERING SQUEAL) 1294 01:01:08,373 --> 01:01:09,957 Good night, Dad. 1295 01:01:11,001 --> 01:01:12,418 Sleep well. 1296 01:01:14,129 --> 01:01:15,629 (SANTA SNORES) 1297 01:01:15,797 --> 01:01:16,964 (KNOCK ON DOOR) 1298 01:01:19,968 --> 01:01:21,010 Oh! 1299 01:01:21,511 --> 01:01:25,097 Sir, we know you shouldn't believe rumors, but we do. 1300 01:01:25,265 --> 01:01:27,016 Is it true you missed a child? 1301 01:01:27,184 --> 01:01:29,352 Me? No, no, no. 1302 01:01:29,519 --> 01:01:31,937 Well, uh, in a way, yes. 1303 01:01:32,105 --> 01:01:33,314 (ALL GASP) 1304 01:01:33,815 --> 01:01:35,066 It was just one. 1305 01:01:35,233 --> 01:01:37,068 In fact, not even that. 1306 01:01:37,235 --> 01:01:39,278 Naught point lots more naughts, 1307 01:01:39,446 --> 01:01:42,156 then a number and some sort of percent at the end. 1308 01:01:42,324 --> 01:01:45,618 Not really an error, just a one. 1309 01:01:45,786 --> 01:01:48,412 One child doesn't matter? Which one? 1310 01:01:48,580 --> 01:01:49,997 Well, I... It's not that... 1311 01:01:50,165 --> 01:01:51,999 SEB: I did nine ones in Greece. 1312 01:01:52,167 --> 01:01:53,751 Did those matter? FERGUS: What about my ones 1313 01:01:53,919 --> 01:01:56,087 in Germany? One of them was twins! 1314 01:01:56,254 --> 01:01:58,005 They don't matter half each. 1315 01:01:58,173 --> 01:02:02,468 Um... Why don't you ask Steve? He can explain. Fiendishly clever. 1316 01:02:02,636 --> 01:02:04,720 But aren't you in charge, sir? 1317 01:02:05,263 --> 01:02:08,766 Of course. I'm Santa. 1318 01:02:08,934 --> 01:02:09,767 THOMAS: Sir, 1319 01:02:09,935 --> 01:02:12,937 if the one that got missed doesn't matter, 1320 01:02:13,105 --> 01:02:15,898 why have Arthur and Grandsanta gone to take it? 1321 01:02:16,191 --> 01:02:20,986 What? Malcolm, what's this about Arthur? 1322 01:02:21,571 --> 01:02:22,863 (ELVES CLAMORING) 1323 01:02:23,115 --> 01:02:24,115 ELF 1: He's crazy. 1324 01:02:24,282 --> 01:02:26,492 DEBORAH: Is there a list of children who don't matter? 1325 01:02:26,660 --> 01:02:28,786 Santa said they don't matter 100 percent. 1326 01:02:28,954 --> 01:02:31,831 ELF 2: Is it true children aren't real, they're just antimatter? 1327 01:02:32,207 --> 01:02:34,250 Shh, shh! Do not... Look. Look! 1328 01:02:34,418 --> 01:02:38,087 I festivized every single country in the world. You see? 1329 01:02:38,255 --> 01:02:40,756 This one, this one, this one. All of them. 1330 01:02:40,924 --> 01:02:44,135 I mean, who cares about one single tiny child? 1331 01:02:44,302 --> 01:02:45,428 (ALL GASP) 1332 01:02:47,097 --> 01:02:49,140 Uh... I do. 1333 01:02:50,058 --> 01:02:51,475 Arthur. 1334 01:02:51,726 --> 01:02:53,853 My poor boy. 1335 01:02:54,104 --> 01:02:55,980 Why on earth would he...? 1336 01:02:56,690 --> 01:03:00,151 You're his brother, Steve. How could you let him? 1337 01:03:00,610 --> 01:03:04,321 And about this child you missed, 1338 01:03:04,489 --> 01:03:07,158 I'm really not sure you made the right decision. 1339 01:03:09,536 --> 01:03:11,954 Is that bird doo on your shoulder? 1340 01:03:12,706 --> 01:03:13,914 Right. 1341 01:03:14,082 --> 01:03:15,541 Over there is Satellite 1342 01:03:15,709 --> 01:03:18,169 Tracking, Navigation, Data Analysis. 1343 01:03:18,336 --> 01:03:22,339 Coffee machine's by the door. Good night, Santa. 1344 01:03:22,632 --> 01:03:26,135 ♪ Gloria ♪ 1345 01:03:26,303 --> 01:03:29,013 ♪ Hosanna in excelsis ♪ ♪ 1346 01:03:32,642 --> 01:03:33,893 SANTA: Um... 1347 01:03:35,353 --> 01:03:36,979 I'll be right back. 1348 01:03:41,693 --> 01:03:43,694 (DOOR CLOSES) 1349 01:03:51,828 --> 01:03:53,829 (♪♪♪) 1350 01:04:15,685 --> 01:04:17,603 ARTHUR: Dear Xiao-Ling, thanks for your letter 1351 01:04:17,771 --> 01:04:19,980 and drawing of Santa tripping over your dog. 1352 01:04:20,148 --> 01:04:21,190 It was hilarious. 1353 01:04:21,358 --> 01:04:22,316 Dear Alessandro, 1354 01:04:22,484 --> 01:04:26,612 I'm sorry your family's had a hard year, but Santa is real. 1355 01:04:26,780 --> 01:04:31,116 Dear Lars, I promise Santa will come. 1356 01:04:31,284 --> 01:04:33,869 He's the greatest man ever. 1357 01:04:52,722 --> 01:04:54,807 Can I burn this? Sure. 1358 01:04:54,975 --> 01:04:55,641 (SIGHS) 1359 01:04:55,809 --> 01:04:57,643 There's millions like it. 1360 01:05:15,161 --> 01:05:15,828 (GRUNTS) 1361 01:05:19,791 --> 01:05:21,500 This picture. 1362 01:05:21,793 --> 01:05:23,961 This drawing! 1363 01:05:24,963 --> 01:05:26,880 It isn't of Dad 1364 01:05:27,757 --> 01:05:28,591 or you 1365 01:05:29,175 --> 01:05:30,509 or Steve. 1366 01:05:32,721 --> 01:05:34,555 This is Santa! 1367 01:05:35,348 --> 01:05:36,140 Ha, ha! 1368 01:05:36,308 --> 01:05:41,604 And as long we get the bike to Gwen before she wakes up, then Santa came! 1369 01:05:42,314 --> 01:05:45,107 And he cares! Ha, ha! 1370 01:05:45,567 --> 01:05:46,692 (PANTING) 1371 01:05:48,653 --> 01:05:50,362 (PLAYING "JINGLE BELLS") 1372 01:05:50,572 --> 01:05:51,780 Excuse! Aah! 1373 01:05:51,948 --> 01:05:53,616 ARTHUR: ♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪ 1374 01:05:53,783 --> 01:05:55,367 ♪ Jingle all the way ♪ 1375 01:05:55,535 --> 01:05:56,827 ♪ Oh, what fun it is to reach ♪ 1376 01:05:56,995 --> 01:05:59,288 ♪ Gwen Hines on Christmas Day Wah-hey! ♪ ♪ 1377 01:06:00,540 --> 01:06:01,832 (ARTHUR GRUNTING) 1378 01:06:02,000 --> 01:06:04,209 ARTHUR: ♪ Jingle Bells This boat smells ♪ 1379 01:06:05,170 --> 01:06:07,379 ♪ Three thousand miles to go ♪ ♪ 1380 01:06:08,423 --> 01:06:09,715 GRANDSANTA: Oh, dear. 1381 01:06:10,091 --> 01:06:13,844 I've seen this before. Sleigh fever, they call it. 1382 01:06:14,012 --> 01:06:16,889 Pressure of Christmas sends a man doolally-tap. 1383 01:06:17,057 --> 01:06:19,975 Santa Claus XVI got it, 1802. 1384 01:06:20,143 --> 01:06:23,145 Every child that year got a sausage nailed to a piece of bark. 1385 01:06:23,438 --> 01:06:24,188 Unh! Whoa! 1386 01:06:24,981 --> 01:06:29,568 Arthur, do you really think you can row the Atlantic Ocean in the next 1387 01:06:29,736 --> 01:06:31,403 37 minutes? It's not, 1388 01:06:31,571 --> 01:06:34,573 unh, too late yet. 1389 01:06:34,741 --> 01:06:36,492 I just have to keep, 1390 01:06:36,660 --> 01:06:37,910 unh, going. 1391 01:06:38,078 --> 01:06:41,497 We need a blunt instrument. Knock him out and regroup. 1392 01:06:41,665 --> 01:06:46,460 MAN (ON HOHO): Make a legal U-turn, then slight right in 4228 miles. 1393 01:06:46,628 --> 01:06:49,046 You do know we're going round in circles? 1394 01:06:49,673 --> 01:06:54,635 You know, we're not the only ones. Maybe I will see Evie again. 1395 01:06:54,928 --> 01:06:56,637 What do you mean? GRANDSANTA: Reindeer are 1396 01:06:56,805 --> 01:06:58,389 brave, powerful beasts 1397 01:06:58,556 --> 01:07:01,684 but they're also dappled cretins with twigs on their heads. 1398 01:07:01,851 --> 01:07:06,355 They'll just keep going in a straight line right round the world. 1399 01:07:06,606 --> 01:07:08,899 They'll be way up in the sky, flying 1400 01:07:09,067 --> 01:07:11,610 at unimaginable speed, but they'll pass 1401 01:07:11,778 --> 01:07:13,779 right over our heads. Great! 1402 01:07:13,947 --> 01:07:15,656 We can get the sleigh back! 1403 01:07:18,410 --> 01:07:19,410 (♪♪♪) 1404 01:07:19,661 --> 01:07:20,327 Chief De Silva. 1405 01:07:20,912 --> 01:07:23,914 Where is this UFO? It's circling the Earth, ma'am. 1406 01:07:24,082 --> 01:07:26,709 Nineteen minutes ago, it went into orbit. 1407 01:07:27,544 --> 01:07:31,046 You? Up there? Catch that with this? 1408 01:07:32,048 --> 01:07:33,048 Magic dust. 1409 01:07:33,216 --> 01:07:34,758 You crack it over your head. 1410 01:07:34,926 --> 01:07:38,846 You'll have to focus. The sleigh'll be coming at you at 45,000 miles an hour. 1411 01:07:39,013 --> 01:07:40,764 45,000...? GRANDSANTA: You'll be torn 1412 01:07:40,932 --> 01:07:41,974 in half! 1413 01:07:42,142 --> 01:07:45,602 Depends on the angle the sleigh hits. You might just get beheaded. 1414 01:07:45,770 --> 01:07:51,024 I've got a phobia of being beheaded, and heights and speed and reindeer 1415 01:07:51,192 --> 01:07:52,276 and buttons. 1416 01:07:52,527 --> 01:07:53,569 Buttons? 1417 01:07:53,737 --> 01:07:55,696 Yeah, I'm pretty much scared of everything. 1418 01:07:55,864 --> 01:07:59,032 Gwen thinks you're coming. Ah! 1419 01:07:59,200 --> 01:08:00,701 You can't do this. Yes, you can! 1420 01:08:00,869 --> 01:08:03,370 No, you can't. Yes, you can! Come on, Arthur! 1421 01:08:03,538 --> 01:08:05,330 Don't worry. Only a raving lunatic... 1422 01:08:05,498 --> 01:08:07,791 I have to worry! It's the only thing I'm good at! 1423 01:08:07,959 --> 01:08:08,959 (GASPS) 1424 01:08:09,127 --> 01:08:10,169 Worry me. 1425 01:08:10,336 --> 01:08:11,962 The sleigh'll be back any minute. 1426 01:08:12,130 --> 01:08:13,756 Come on. Worry me, quickly! 1427 01:08:14,799 --> 01:08:17,342 Imagine Gwen, all alone, 1428 01:08:17,510 --> 01:08:20,012 nothing under the tree. Here we go. Unh. 1429 01:08:20,638 --> 01:08:21,305 (YELLS) 1430 01:08:21,473 --> 01:08:22,848 No! Don't like this! Stop! Stop! Stop! 1431 01:08:23,016 --> 01:08:23,849 Get me down! 1432 01:08:24,017 --> 01:08:25,476 The tears as she finds she's been left out. 1433 01:08:26,269 --> 01:08:28,353 Screaming, "Santa didn't come!" 1434 01:08:28,521 --> 01:08:29,521 Oh, Gwen. 1435 01:08:29,689 --> 01:08:31,482 No! It's just 1436 01:08:31,649 --> 01:08:33,776 too high! BRYONY: Gwen in the street 1437 01:08:33,985 --> 01:08:36,069 surrounded by kids on new bikes, pointing: 1438 01:08:36,488 --> 01:08:39,323 "That's the girl that Santa hates!" 1439 01:08:39,491 --> 01:08:43,619 She runs away, alcoholic by the age of 9. Dead before she's even...! 1440 01:08:43,787 --> 01:08:46,371 She may never build a snowman again! 1441 01:08:46,539 --> 01:08:47,414 (ARTHUR YELLS) 1442 01:08:47,749 --> 01:08:50,793 What if there are buttons on the sleigh I don't know about?! 1443 01:08:51,002 --> 01:08:53,003 Here it is! 1444 01:09:03,681 --> 01:09:04,807 Um... 1445 01:09:04,974 --> 01:09:05,808 (SCREAMING) 1446 01:09:06,392 --> 01:09:07,684 (♪♪♪) 1447 01:09:12,524 --> 01:09:14,191 How do you think he's, uh...? 1448 01:09:14,359 --> 01:09:17,694 Fine, fine. Probably just, uh... 1449 01:09:17,862 --> 01:09:19,863 (♪♪♪) 1450 01:09:20,031 --> 01:09:21,573 (SCREAMING AND WHIMPERING) 1451 01:09:28,081 --> 01:09:30,040 (WHISTLING "GOOD KING WENCESLAS") 1452 01:09:32,335 --> 01:09:35,671 So how come they didn't scrap the sleigh, sir? 1453 01:09:35,839 --> 01:09:39,591 I threatened the elves. Said I'd feed them to the polar bears. 1454 01:09:39,759 --> 01:09:41,009 (CLEARS THROAT) 1455 01:09:43,847 --> 01:09:44,513 Whoa! 1456 01:09:46,474 --> 01:09:47,349 (GRUNTING) 1457 01:09:51,312 --> 01:09:56,275 Elf, how do you fancy being the one to tell his parents about all this? 1458 01:09:57,569 --> 01:09:58,235 (YELLING) 1459 01:10:04,242 --> 01:10:05,868 (GRUNTS THEN WHIMPERING AND YELLING) 1460 01:10:10,456 --> 01:10:12,165 Whoa! Whoa! 1461 01:10:12,333 --> 01:10:13,250 Whoa! 1462 01:10:20,842 --> 01:10:22,050 (ARTHUR SCREAMING) 1463 01:10:26,389 --> 01:10:27,055 (BRYONY COUGHING) 1464 01:10:27,223 --> 01:10:28,849 (WHEEZING) 1465 01:10:29,017 --> 01:10:31,560 Yay! Arthur! 1466 01:10:31,728 --> 01:10:33,604 You did it! I did it with worry! 1467 01:10:33,771 --> 01:10:36,315 Oh, I was sure you'd die. It was great! 1468 01:10:36,524 --> 01:10:38,483 MAN (ON HOHO): Proceed to the highlighted route. 1469 01:10:38,651 --> 01:10:40,444 (IN WAVERING VOICE) Proceed to the highlighted. 1470 01:10:41,946 --> 01:10:44,281 Just keep worrying about Gwen. 1471 01:10:44,449 --> 01:10:47,534 I'll find a way there, boy. Whatever it takes. 1472 01:10:47,952 --> 01:10:49,661 To Trelew! 1473 01:10:53,541 --> 01:10:54,374 Margaret. 1474 01:10:54,542 --> 01:10:56,418 Hand me my Me suit. 1475 01:10:56,586 --> 01:10:58,253 All sorted. Steve's, uh... 1476 01:10:58,421 --> 01:10:59,671 holding the fort 1477 01:10:59,839 --> 01:11:02,633 while I deliver the present, yes, 1478 01:11:02,800 --> 01:11:04,593 and find Arthur and Father. 1479 01:11:04,928 --> 01:11:06,011 Well done, dear. 1480 01:11:06,179 --> 01:11:09,890 Trelew's on a course of 187.7 degrees from the geographic pole 1481 01:11:10,058 --> 01:11:11,767 but as it's the old sleigh, 1482 01:11:11,935 --> 01:11:14,561 allow a drift margin of 1000 miles either side 1483 01:11:14,729 --> 01:11:17,064 of the meridian. Got a sweater for Arthur, 1484 01:11:17,231 --> 01:11:18,398 your father's pills, 1485 01:11:18,566 --> 01:11:20,442 and some nice sweet tea. 1486 01:11:21,152 --> 01:11:22,110 Hm. 1487 01:11:22,695 --> 01:11:23,904 (CRASH) 1488 01:11:26,908 --> 01:11:28,033 COMPUTER: Curtains. 1489 01:11:31,120 --> 01:11:32,704 S-1 dented. PETER: Sir. Sir! 1490 01:11:32,872 --> 01:11:33,538 Big scratch 1491 01:11:33,706 --> 01:11:34,623 down side. 1492 01:11:34,791 --> 01:11:37,042 "Popped out to take present. 1493 01:11:37,377 --> 01:11:39,336 Turkey sandwich in fridge. Mum and Dad." 1494 01:11:39,504 --> 01:11:40,837 Espresso machine broken. 1495 01:11:41,005 --> 01:11:43,298 That idiot, Arthur. He's sent 1496 01:11:43,466 --> 01:11:44,925 everyone crazy. 1497 01:11:45,093 --> 01:11:46,426 He'll destroy Christmas. 1498 01:11:46,594 --> 01:11:49,096 And you'll never get to be Santa. 1499 01:11:50,348 --> 01:11:52,265 Steven! 1500 01:11:52,600 --> 01:11:53,850 I, um... 1501 01:11:54,268 --> 01:11:57,312 23 Mimosa Avenue, Trelew. 1502 01:11:58,231 --> 01:11:58,897 Malcolm, 1503 01:11:59,065 --> 01:12:01,358 there's no harm in using a manual. 1504 01:12:01,526 --> 01:12:04,277 Men. Margaret, I order you to disembark. 1505 01:12:04,445 --> 01:12:05,737 It's not safe. Unh! 1506 01:12:05,905 --> 01:12:08,949 Piffle. I did a microlight flying course on the Internet. 1507 01:12:09,117 --> 01:12:11,034 It can't be that different. 1508 01:12:11,869 --> 01:12:13,870 Oh! Steve. 1509 01:12:14,747 --> 01:12:17,624 You've dented it! You take it out without asking? 1510 01:12:17,792 --> 01:12:19,626 Malcolm, you told me he knew. 1511 01:12:19,794 --> 01:12:21,837 You know how Steve feels about his S-1. 1512 01:12:22,005 --> 01:12:24,423 It's my S-1 . S for "Santa." 1513 01:12:24,590 --> 01:12:26,591 I'm flying to this child. 1514 01:12:26,759 --> 01:12:30,220 Of course she's all that matters. Not me, your son. 1515 01:12:30,388 --> 01:12:32,556 Not the 2 billion things I did right tonight. 1516 01:12:32,724 --> 01:12:34,016 No! 1517 01:12:35,101 --> 01:12:37,394 This is about that pool table, isn't it? 1518 01:12:37,562 --> 01:12:40,272 I told you, you should've written to me. 1519 01:12:40,440 --> 01:12:42,733 I was 8. You're my dad! 1520 01:12:42,900 --> 01:12:43,942 For goodness sake! 1521 01:12:44,110 --> 01:12:46,028 Arthur and Grandsanta are out there 1522 01:12:46,195 --> 01:12:48,363 probably not wearing nearly enough layers 1523 01:12:48,531 --> 01:12:51,366 and you two are bickering over a big red toy?! 1524 01:12:51,534 --> 01:12:53,493 I'm not bickering. If Steven could just 1525 01:12:53,661 --> 01:12:54,536 stand back... Ooh! 1526 01:12:54,912 --> 01:12:56,204 COMPUTER: Air bag. 1527 01:13:02,670 --> 01:13:04,546 You drive, Steven. 1528 01:13:05,173 --> 01:13:06,214 Thank you. 1529 01:13:06,382 --> 01:13:10,052 So since gift delivery to child 47785BXK 1530 01:13:10,219 --> 01:13:11,553 is all that seems 1531 01:13:11,721 --> 01:13:13,180 to matter, 1532 01:13:13,347 --> 01:13:14,473 I'll do it myself. 1533 01:13:14,640 --> 01:13:18,310 Then we'll pick up Arthur and Grandsanta from whatever ditch they ended up in. 1534 01:13:18,603 --> 01:13:19,978 Maximum thrust. 1535 01:13:24,650 --> 01:13:27,903 Um, when Santa said he'd be right back, 1536 01:13:28,071 --> 01:13:29,863 what do you think he...? 1537 01:13:30,031 --> 01:13:31,990 He's not coming back! 1538 01:13:32,158 --> 01:13:33,575 The Santas are leaving! 1539 01:13:33,743 --> 01:13:34,785 Children don't matter? 1540 01:13:34,952 --> 01:13:36,328 Christmas doesn't matter! 1541 01:13:36,496 --> 01:13:37,245 Nothing matters! 1542 01:13:37,413 --> 01:13:39,206 It's like 1816! 1543 01:13:39,373 --> 01:13:40,082 (ALL GASP) 1544 01:13:40,249 --> 01:13:41,124 Abandon the North Pole! 1545 01:13:41,292 --> 01:13:43,335 DEBORAH: Everybody, panic! COMPUTER: Are you sure you want 1546 01:13:43,503 --> 01:13:44,753 to delete Christmas? 1547 01:13:45,630 --> 01:13:46,713 Meltdown: 10 minutes. 1548 01:13:46,881 --> 01:13:49,257 ELF 1: Head south! ELF 2: It's all south from here, you fool! 1549 01:13:49,759 --> 01:13:51,510 (♪♪♪) 1550 01:13:51,803 --> 01:13:53,512 I know where we can find 1551 01:13:53,679 --> 01:13:54,679 a map, lad! 1552 01:13:56,557 --> 01:13:57,224 A bit 1553 01:13:57,391 --> 01:13:58,058 risky, this. 1554 01:14:00,353 --> 01:14:02,938 Breaking the rules, even in the old days. 1555 01:14:09,570 --> 01:14:11,571 (♪♪♪) 1556 01:14:23,751 --> 01:14:25,127 There! 1557 01:14:25,336 --> 01:14:27,796 Biggest map in the world! 1558 01:14:32,510 --> 01:14:33,510 Dash! 1559 01:14:36,139 --> 01:14:39,516 DE SILVA: Friends, on this night of peace, we stand confronted 1560 01:14:39,684 --> 01:14:41,351 by an unknown danger. 1561 01:14:41,519 --> 01:14:44,688 Aliens. Aliens from space. 1562 01:14:44,897 --> 01:14:47,524 MAN 1: Blast them from the skies! WOMAN 1: Let us do an autopsy. 1563 01:14:47,692 --> 01:14:49,818 But maybe the aliens come in peace? 1564 01:14:49,986 --> 01:14:50,944 They burst an inflatable 1565 01:14:51,112 --> 01:14:53,572 Santa Claus in Toronto. On Christmas night! 1566 01:14:53,781 --> 01:14:56,283 WOMAN 2: What a terrible thing. DE SILVA: Let us attempt contact, 1567 01:14:56,534 --> 01:14:59,619 but be ready to save our planet. 1568 01:15:01,664 --> 01:15:04,207 GRANDSANTA: Hold tight, lad. This is where it gets 1569 01:15:04,375 --> 01:15:05,417 really rough. 1570 01:15:07,670 --> 01:15:08,336 (GRUNTING) 1571 01:15:15,136 --> 01:15:16,261 (ALL YELL) 1572 01:15:18,347 --> 01:15:19,681 Not now, 1573 01:15:19,849 --> 01:15:21,057 you sack of antlers. 1574 01:15:28,482 --> 01:15:29,816 (ALL CHEERING) 1575 01:15:30,484 --> 01:15:31,651 MAN (OVER PA): Alert level six. 1576 01:15:31,819 --> 01:15:33,737 It's coming down through the atmosphere. 1577 01:15:33,905 --> 01:15:34,863 We'll see it. 1578 01:15:35,031 --> 01:15:36,364 Forty-six, 45, 1579 01:15:36,908 --> 01:15:39,034 44, 43. 1580 01:15:39,243 --> 01:15:42,245 They'll be waiting for us, sir. We were on the news. 1581 01:15:42,413 --> 01:15:46,291 All their technology against my Evie. 1582 01:15:46,459 --> 01:15:49,211 Oh, come on. Let's do it with worry! 1583 01:15:50,421 --> 01:15:53,215 Santa mustn't be seen, eh, lad? 1584 01:15:53,382 --> 01:15:54,633 Let's give them 1585 01:15:54,800 --> 01:15:55,967 something to shoot at. 1586 01:15:57,220 --> 01:15:58,345 We have visual. 1587 01:15:58,512 --> 01:15:59,679 Here it comes. 1588 01:15:59,931 --> 01:16:01,056 (ALL GASP) 1589 01:16:01,641 --> 01:16:04,017 GRANDSANTA: Take us to your leader. Ha-ha-ha! 1590 01:16:04,769 --> 01:16:05,560 ARTHUR: England! 1591 01:16:06,479 --> 01:16:07,771 GRANDSANTA: No sign of anyone. 1592 01:16:07,939 --> 01:16:10,523 ARTHUR: The sun's coming up! Come on, lad! You can 1593 01:16:10,691 --> 01:16:12,067 do it! Move your hooves! 1594 01:16:12,652 --> 01:16:14,569 Mankind greets you. Do you copy? 1595 01:16:14,779 --> 01:16:17,614 Season's greetings from mankind. Good morning, do you copy? 1596 01:16:17,823 --> 01:16:20,033 The hull is some kind of woody substance, ma'am. 1597 01:16:20,201 --> 01:16:21,743 Like wood. 1598 01:16:21,911 --> 01:16:23,787 Coated in lead paint. 1599 01:16:23,955 --> 01:16:25,288 The engine seems to be alive. 1600 01:16:25,456 --> 01:16:27,123 And furry. 1601 01:16:27,583 --> 01:16:29,084 GRANDSANTA: Come on, lad! 1602 01:16:29,252 --> 01:16:30,460 Put your back 1603 01:16:30,628 --> 01:16:31,294 into it! 1604 01:16:31,462 --> 01:16:33,171 ♪ Dashing through the snow ♪ 1605 01:16:33,339 --> 01:16:34,756 ALL: ♪ In a one horse open sleigh ♪ 1606 01:16:35,341 --> 01:16:37,467 ♪ Over the fields we go ♪ 1607 01:16:37,635 --> 01:16:39,511 ♪ Laughing all the way, ha, ha, ha ♪ ♪ 1608 01:16:39,720 --> 01:16:42,639 I have something. It's very faint but... 1609 01:16:42,807 --> 01:16:43,723 Scramble drone. 1610 01:16:43,891 --> 01:16:46,685 ALL: ♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way ♪ ♪ 1611 01:16:47,019 --> 01:16:48,561 ARTHUR: That's it, there! 1612 01:16:48,729 --> 01:16:49,896 We made it! Yay! 1613 01:16:52,108 --> 01:16:53,692 Not quite. 1614 01:16:53,859 --> 01:16:54,567 Dash! 1615 01:16:56,404 --> 01:16:57,862 (♪♪♪) 1616 01:16:58,030 --> 01:17:00,031 It's right up me steam pipe! 1617 01:17:00,533 --> 01:17:02,492 It's tracking something electronic! 1618 01:17:02,660 --> 01:17:03,785 We haven't got 1619 01:17:03,953 --> 01:17:06,079 any "electrickery." Just wood 1620 01:17:06,289 --> 01:17:07,330 and brass and... 1621 01:17:07,498 --> 01:17:08,581 Oh, dear. 1622 01:17:08,749 --> 01:17:10,417 BRYONY & GRANDSANTA: Your slipper! 1623 01:17:11,168 --> 01:17:12,168 We have lock. 1624 01:17:12,795 --> 01:17:14,462 We got to get you down there, lad. 1625 01:17:14,630 --> 01:17:16,881 They'll see us! We'll be stopped! Give me that. 1626 01:17:17,383 --> 01:17:20,302 What are you doing? It's Evie they're after. 1627 01:17:20,469 --> 01:17:24,347 She doesn't fit this world, Arthur. She's a relic. 1628 01:17:24,515 --> 01:17:25,307 Evie? 1629 01:17:25,474 --> 01:17:29,436 I always knew she'd be needed one more time. 1630 01:17:29,937 --> 01:17:32,814 You go on. We'll let them have her. 1631 01:17:32,982 --> 01:17:34,399 You're coming too. 1632 01:17:34,567 --> 01:17:39,279 You were right, Arthur. It doesn't matter how Santa's gift gets there. 1633 01:17:39,447 --> 01:17:41,531 Doesn't even matter if it's 1634 01:17:41,699 --> 01:17:45,118 Mr. Postman in his spaceship. As long as it gets there. 1635 01:17:45,286 --> 01:17:48,913 You made it happen, lad. No one got left out. 1636 01:17:49,206 --> 01:17:50,540 Get off. 1637 01:17:50,708 --> 01:17:52,083 Now, do as I say. 1638 01:17:52,793 --> 01:17:54,085 MAN: They're firing on us! 1639 01:17:54,253 --> 01:17:56,087 A death ray! Made of chocolate 1640 01:17:56,255 --> 01:17:58,298 and oranges. WOMAN: Unidentified 1641 01:17:58,466 --> 01:17:59,591 varnished object, 1642 01:17:59,759 --> 01:18:01,051 turn back or we shoot. 1643 01:18:01,218 --> 01:18:01,926 Go! 1644 01:18:02,720 --> 01:18:03,720 Turn back. 1645 01:18:05,931 --> 01:18:07,974 Happy Christmas! 1646 01:18:08,142 --> 01:18:10,435 In Santa we believe! 1647 01:18:11,812 --> 01:18:12,479 Go on, elf. 1648 01:18:12,772 --> 01:18:14,147 You too. 1649 01:18:15,232 --> 01:18:16,066 Hi-yah! 1650 01:18:17,651 --> 01:18:19,277 DE SILVA: Fire missiles. 1651 01:18:20,363 --> 01:18:21,738 This is it, old fella. 1652 01:18:22,531 --> 01:18:23,365 Maybe the next 1653 01:18:23,532 --> 01:18:25,950 Santa never sat in my Evie, 1654 01:18:26,118 --> 01:18:27,410 but Arthur did. 1655 01:18:27,578 --> 01:18:31,456 And he's as good a man as any Santa there's ever been. 1656 01:18:32,166 --> 01:18:32,957 (♪♪♪) 1657 01:18:33,167 --> 01:18:33,833 Yah! 1658 01:18:37,630 --> 01:18:38,671 Goodbye, Evie. 1659 01:18:43,886 --> 01:18:44,552 (ALL SIGH) 1660 01:18:44,720 --> 01:18:45,762 Thank you, everyone. 1661 01:18:45,930 --> 01:18:48,306 You just saved Christmas. 1662 01:18:50,601 --> 01:18:51,351 (BOTH YELL) 1663 01:18:56,857 --> 01:18:58,650 (♪♪♪) 1664 01:18:59,902 --> 01:19:00,735 STEVE: Trelew. 1665 01:19:04,865 --> 01:19:07,826 Out with the old, in with the new. 1666 01:19:08,160 --> 01:19:10,120 Well done, dear. 1667 01:19:16,252 --> 01:19:19,921 Poor Arthur. He tried so hard. 1668 01:19:20,297 --> 01:19:22,257 He's flunked again. Of course 1669 01:19:22,466 --> 01:19:23,591 he hasn't, dear. 1670 01:19:23,759 --> 01:19:27,470 We're here. The little girl will get her present. 1671 01:19:27,638 --> 01:19:30,473 I think he's done rather splendidly. 1672 01:19:31,559 --> 01:19:33,268 My Margaret. 1673 01:19:33,436 --> 01:19:34,936 (DOORBELL RINGS OVER MONITOR) 1674 01:19:35,855 --> 01:19:39,357 Good morning, Gwen. Ho, ho, et cetera. 1675 01:19:39,525 --> 01:19:41,109 Apologies for the minor delay. 1676 01:19:41,277 --> 01:19:43,486 I'm sure that even a child can understand 1677 01:19:43,654 --> 01:19:46,030 that in an operation as complex as Christmas, 1678 01:19:46,198 --> 01:19:49,784 there's always an insignificant margin of error, 1679 01:19:49,952 --> 01:19:51,911 which is you. As a gesture, 1680 01:19:52,079 --> 01:19:55,832 I've upgraded you to the Glamorfast Ultra X-3 1681 01:19:56,000 --> 01:19:58,543 which retails at 9.99 more than your requested gift. 1682 01:19:59,253 --> 01:20:01,963 Bigger ergo better. 1683 01:20:02,131 --> 01:20:04,424 If you wouldn't mind just signing a legal waiver? 1684 01:20:05,009 --> 01:20:06,676 (SPEAKING IN SPANISH) 1685 01:20:09,680 --> 01:20:12,015 Pedro? A boy? 1686 01:20:14,477 --> 01:20:15,852 A Spanish boy? 1687 01:20:16,562 --> 01:20:17,645 This is an error. 1688 01:20:17,938 --> 01:20:19,397 (SPEAKS IN SPANISH) 1689 01:20:19,565 --> 01:20:20,398 Now get off the bike. 1690 01:20:20,566 --> 01:20:21,232 (BOY CRIES) 1691 01:20:21,400 --> 01:20:22,484 Will you get...? 1692 01:20:22,651 --> 01:20:24,569 No, no, no. Please don't cry. 1693 01:20:24,945 --> 01:20:26,404 No cry-o. 1694 01:20:28,073 --> 01:20:28,823 (DOG BARKING OVER MONITOR) 1695 01:20:28,991 --> 01:20:31,409 No, uh, "sob-idad." 1696 01:20:31,785 --> 01:20:33,369 Uh... 1697 01:20:39,043 --> 01:20:40,460 It's over a mile. 1698 01:20:40,628 --> 01:20:41,586 We've got no sleigh, 1699 01:20:41,754 --> 01:20:44,714 no reindeer, and you can't even walk. 1700 01:20:46,967 --> 01:20:48,259 What are you doing? 1701 01:20:48,511 --> 01:20:49,594 (♪♪♪) 1702 01:20:52,306 --> 01:20:53,014 I can cycle! 1703 01:20:53,807 --> 01:20:55,266 Oi! Come back! 1704 01:20:55,434 --> 01:20:57,560 What about the wrapping?! 1705 01:20:59,146 --> 01:21:01,606 ARTHUR: The church. She lives by the church! 1706 01:21:01,774 --> 01:21:04,025 Happy Christmas, cows! 1707 01:21:04,193 --> 01:21:07,654 COMPUTER: Meltdown. Ten seconds to figgy Flensburg. Snowman. 1708 01:21:07,821 --> 01:21:10,406 German, leave out the carrot. Is Santa on shoe? 1709 01:21:10,908 --> 01:21:12,116 What the...?! 1710 01:21:13,619 --> 01:21:16,162 Look, everyone! It's Arthur! 1711 01:21:16,330 --> 01:21:18,915 He's delivering the present. 1712 01:21:19,083 --> 01:21:21,376 It's Arthur. ELF: Hooray for Arthur! 1713 01:21:21,585 --> 01:21:22,835 COMPUTER: Meltdown paused. 1714 01:21:26,006 --> 01:21:27,257 BRYONY: Come back! 1715 01:21:28,634 --> 01:21:29,592 (GRANDSANTA COUGHS) 1716 01:21:29,760 --> 01:21:31,803 Oh, my head. 1717 01:21:32,304 --> 01:21:34,472 Ye baubles, a beautiful young reindeer. 1718 01:21:34,640 --> 01:21:37,100 Ah. So who am I, then? 1719 01:21:37,851 --> 01:21:38,518 (GRUNTS) 1720 01:21:38,686 --> 01:21:41,104 Okay, so I'm not great with children. 1721 01:21:41,730 --> 01:21:43,523 Does that make me a bad Santa? 1722 01:21:44,984 --> 01:21:46,150 You're hardly perfect. 1723 01:21:46,318 --> 01:21:49,445 Let me guess. You put in the address, you saw a list of Trelews 1724 01:21:49,613 --> 01:21:51,531 and just clicked on the first one? 1725 01:21:51,699 --> 01:21:53,157 You're just like Arthur. 1726 01:21:54,243 --> 01:21:55,743 Am I? COMPUTER: North Pole, 1727 01:21:59,373 --> 01:22:00,373 DEBORAH: But, sir, 1728 01:22:00,541 --> 01:22:03,251 it's Arthur. He's still going. 1729 01:22:03,419 --> 01:22:05,920 ELVES (CHANTING): Arthur! Arthur! Arthur! 1730 01:22:07,047 --> 01:22:08,339 Arthur? 1731 01:22:08,716 --> 01:22:09,632 (♪♪♪) 1732 01:22:09,800 --> 01:22:10,675 Yah! 1733 01:22:10,884 --> 01:22:13,886 No one gets an unwrapped present on my watch. 1734 01:22:16,974 --> 01:22:18,433 Three bits of sticky tape. 1735 01:22:18,809 --> 01:22:19,976 Three. 1736 01:22:20,769 --> 01:22:22,103 Stand up! 1737 01:22:25,190 --> 01:22:26,024 Finger! 1738 01:22:27,818 --> 01:22:28,860 ARTHUR: The church! 1739 01:22:30,029 --> 01:22:32,614 Whoa! 1740 01:22:33,907 --> 01:22:35,283 Right foot. 1741 01:22:36,619 --> 01:22:37,952 Left foot. 1742 01:22:38,954 --> 01:22:39,746 ARTHUR: There it is! 1743 01:22:43,542 --> 01:22:44,709 One! 1744 01:22:48,130 --> 01:22:49,047 Hands up! 1745 01:22:49,214 --> 01:22:50,840 (YELLING) 1746 01:22:54,595 --> 01:22:55,720 Whoa! 1747 01:22:57,389 --> 01:22:58,181 Whoa. 1748 01:22:58,891 --> 01:22:59,849 ELVES (CHANTING): Arthur! 1749 01:23:00,017 --> 01:23:02,435 Arthur! Arthur! Arthur! 1750 01:23:02,603 --> 01:23:03,311 Nearly there! 1751 01:23:05,522 --> 01:23:06,898 BRYONY: Front wheel! 1752 01:23:09,943 --> 01:23:10,818 Unh! Whoa! 1753 01:23:13,072 --> 01:23:14,155 Two! Yes! 1754 01:23:15,699 --> 01:23:16,491 That's it, there! 1755 01:23:17,493 --> 01:23:18,576 BRYONY: Whoa! 1756 01:23:19,870 --> 01:23:20,745 Back wheel! 1757 01:23:21,997 --> 01:23:23,665 Ready? Do it! 1758 01:23:25,417 --> 01:23:26,084 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 1759 01:23:27,628 --> 01:23:29,003 Here we go! 1760 01:23:30,756 --> 01:23:32,048 (BOTH SCREAMING) 1761 01:23:33,634 --> 01:23:34,300 (SQUEAKING) 1762 01:23:39,973 --> 01:23:40,932 Three! 1763 01:23:44,186 --> 01:23:45,186 (BRYONY GROANS) 1764 01:23:45,646 --> 01:23:47,105 Elf down. 1765 01:23:47,481 --> 01:23:48,523 Bryony? 1766 01:23:48,732 --> 01:23:51,234 Go on, Arthur. Quick! 1767 01:23:52,319 --> 01:23:54,362 There's always time for a bow. 1768 01:23:56,198 --> 01:23:58,074 (♪♪♪) 1769 01:24:03,706 --> 01:24:06,708 No, we can't be too late. 1770 01:24:12,923 --> 01:24:14,924 (♪♪♪) 1771 01:24:23,225 --> 01:24:24,350 (ARTHUR GRUNTING) 1772 01:24:26,478 --> 01:24:27,729 (♪♪♪) 1773 01:24:30,482 --> 01:24:32,400 Unh. It's so unfair. 1774 01:24:33,444 --> 01:24:34,110 (GRUNTS) 1775 01:24:35,028 --> 01:24:37,321 Ho, ho, ho! 1776 01:24:37,656 --> 01:24:39,782 Merry Christmas! 1777 01:24:41,785 --> 01:24:44,203 ELVES: ♪ I'm dreaming of a white Christmas ♪ ♪ 1778 01:24:44,496 --> 01:24:46,748 All the Santas taking the missing present. 1779 01:24:46,915 --> 01:24:48,082 It's beautiful! 1780 01:24:48,250 --> 01:24:50,543 Hug me. Hug me. Aah! 1781 01:24:55,674 --> 01:24:56,966 (TOY SQUEAKS) 1782 01:24:57,968 --> 01:25:00,136 (GRUNTS THEN CHUCKLES) 1783 01:25:05,601 --> 01:25:07,185 (♪♪♪) 1784 01:25:25,454 --> 01:25:26,537 (WHISPERS) Dad! 1785 01:25:26,705 --> 01:25:29,707 You came! I knew you would. 1786 01:25:29,875 --> 01:25:32,543 You wouldn't just go to bed and forget Gwen. 1787 01:25:34,338 --> 01:25:36,798 You're Santa! 1788 01:25:42,805 --> 01:25:44,013 STEVE (WHISPERING): Give me that. 1789 01:25:44,181 --> 01:25:45,932 I'm Santa! I'm delivering it! 1790 01:25:46,099 --> 01:25:49,101 (WHISPERING) Don't be silly, I'm Santa. Can't you see from me suit? 1791 01:25:49,269 --> 01:25:51,729 (WHISPERING) I am actually Santa, and I think it would be best... 1792 01:25:51,897 --> 01:25:53,731 I'm Santa! You handed over! 1793 01:25:53,899 --> 01:25:56,609 I didn't, in fact, technically... You said I could drive! 1794 01:25:56,777 --> 01:26:00,238 I'm Santa, you naughty boys. Here, have a bonbon. 1795 01:26:00,405 --> 01:26:01,239 You... 1796 01:26:01,406 --> 01:26:02,573 Shh! 1797 01:26:03,617 --> 01:26:04,992 GWEN: It's Christmas! 1798 01:26:05,953 --> 01:26:07,286 ARTHUR: Please. 1799 01:26:08,205 --> 01:26:11,624 Gwen just has to have a present from Santa. 1800 01:26:17,464 --> 01:26:19,382 You do it, Arthur. 1801 01:26:21,343 --> 01:26:23,427 GWEN: Mummy! Daddy! Wake up! 1802 01:26:25,305 --> 01:26:26,681 (♪♪♪) 1803 01:26:34,064 --> 01:26:35,022 Ho, ho, ho! 1804 01:26:35,274 --> 01:26:37,483 GWEN: There's a ribbon! To downstairs! 1805 01:26:38,569 --> 01:26:42,363 SANTA: Father, please keep it down. Merry Christmas, everyone. 1806 01:26:42,948 --> 01:26:44,156 STEVE: Unh! Oh. 1807 01:26:44,324 --> 01:26:44,991 Dad, wait. 1808 01:26:46,410 --> 01:26:48,202 Please, let's... 1809 01:26:49,413 --> 01:26:50,496 Oh. 1810 01:26:50,664 --> 01:26:54,584 In all my years, I've never actually... 1811 01:26:55,919 --> 01:26:57,879 Always so busy. 1812 01:26:58,046 --> 01:27:00,047 (♪♪♪) 1813 01:27:01,967 --> 01:27:03,342 Too busy. 1814 01:27:04,469 --> 01:27:06,262 I'm not good at... 1815 01:27:09,600 --> 01:27:13,436 In my day, a pat on the back and a walnut went a long way. 1816 01:27:14,396 --> 01:27:17,857 GWEN: Mummy, Daddy, come on! Look, a ribbon to downstairs! 1817 01:27:18,025 --> 01:27:20,484 DAD: Come on, then. GWEN: I think it's under the tree! 1818 01:27:20,652 --> 01:27:22,153 Oh, look! 1819 01:27:22,696 --> 01:27:23,821 What is it? 1820 01:27:23,989 --> 01:27:25,740 I can see pink! 1821 01:27:26,992 --> 01:27:29,285 It's a bike! 1822 01:27:29,995 --> 01:27:31,120 Oh! Heh. 1823 01:27:31,288 --> 01:27:34,373 Santa brought me the bike I wanted! 1824 01:27:34,541 --> 01:27:35,458 MOM: Did he? 1825 01:27:35,626 --> 01:27:39,128 GWEN: Oh. Can I have a go? Please, please, please? Ha-ha-ha. 1826 01:27:39,421 --> 01:27:40,087 Steve, 1827 01:27:40,672 --> 01:27:42,882 you deserve to be Santa. 1828 01:27:50,641 --> 01:27:52,099 But, Steve, 1829 01:27:52,267 --> 01:27:56,479 I wonder if Gwen is right. 1830 01:27:56,647 --> 01:27:57,480 (BICYCLE BELL RINGING) 1831 01:27:57,648 --> 01:27:59,357 (GWEN GIGGLING) 1832 01:27:59,524 --> 01:28:02,109 GWEN: Watch out. Beep, beep. Careful, 1833 01:28:02,277 --> 01:28:03,778 I'm gonna bump into you. 1834 01:28:08,241 --> 01:28:09,575 Oh, no. 1835 01:28:16,124 --> 01:28:17,667 (♪♪♪) 1836 01:28:19,336 --> 01:28:22,171 I'll be the candle, eh? 1837 01:28:26,051 --> 01:28:27,343 Whoopee! 1838 01:28:31,640 --> 01:28:34,141 You're better men than... 1839 01:28:34,309 --> 01:28:35,643 (SNIFFLES) 1840 01:28:35,811 --> 01:28:37,228 Both of you. 1841 01:28:37,771 --> 01:28:40,648 GWEN: Oh! A bike and 1842 01:28:40,816 --> 01:28:42,233 a squirrel! Huh? 1843 01:28:42,401 --> 01:28:43,526 GWEN: Oh! DAD: Whoa! 1844 01:28:45,737 --> 01:28:47,363 Drop complete. 1845 01:28:49,032 --> 01:28:51,409 And we have a new Santa! 1846 01:28:51,576 --> 01:28:52,243 (ALL CHEERING) 1847 01:28:52,411 --> 01:28:53,828 COMPUTER: Christmas accomplished. 1848 01:28:53,996 --> 01:28:54,870 ELF: Arthur! 1849 01:28:55,288 --> 01:28:57,707 Oh, Arthur. COMPUTER: Commence 1850 01:28:57,874 --> 01:28:59,333 decking halls. 1851 01:28:59,501 --> 01:29:03,713 You know, I've always liked Arthur. Do you think he likes espresso? 1852 01:29:06,258 --> 01:29:06,924 (GRUNTS) 1853 01:29:14,433 --> 01:29:15,349 (GASPS) 1854 01:29:16,476 --> 01:29:17,935 Oh? Oh! 1855 01:29:19,479 --> 01:29:20,187 (GIGGLING) 1856 01:29:20,355 --> 01:29:21,188 (BICYCLE BELL RINGING) 1857 01:29:21,606 --> 01:29:23,107 (♪♪♪) 1858 01:29:49,509 --> 01:29:52,511 (BILL NIGHY'S "MAKE SOMEONE HAPPY" PLAYING) 1859 01:29:57,768 --> 01:30:01,312 ♪ It's so important To make someone happy ♪ 1860 01:30:02,105 --> 01:30:05,566 ♪ Make just one someone happy ♪ 1861 01:30:06,234 --> 01:30:10,112 ♪ Make just one heart The heart you ♪ 1862 01:30:11,531 --> 01:30:13,783 ♪ You sing to ♪ 1863 01:30:14,076 --> 01:30:18,204 ♪ One smile that cheers you ♪ 1864 01:30:18,747 --> 01:30:22,291 ♪ One face that lights When it nears you ♪ 1865 01:30:22,876 --> 01:30:24,752 ♪ One girl you're ♪ 1866 01:30:25,545 --> 01:30:29,548 ♪ You're everything to ♪ 1867 01:30:30,550 --> 01:30:34,553 ♪ Fame, if you win it ♪ 1868 01:30:35,180 --> 01:30:38,974 ♪ Comes and goes in a minute ♪ 1869 01:30:39,476 --> 01:30:42,853 ♪ Where's the real stuff in life ♪ 1870 01:30:44,022 --> 01:30:46,273 ♪ To cling to? ♪ 1871 01:30:47,484 --> 01:30:51,654 ♪ Love is the answer ♪ 1872 01:30:52,280 --> 01:30:56,325 ♪ Someone to love is the answer ♪ 1873 01:30:57,119 --> 01:30:59,995 ♪ Once you've found her ♪ 1874 01:31:00,664 --> 01:31:03,958 ♪ Build your world around her ♪ 1875 01:31:04,459 --> 01:31:08,504 ♪ Make someone happy ♪ 1876 01:31:09,047 --> 01:31:12,883 ♪ Make just one someone happy ♪ 1877 01:31:13,510 --> 01:31:17,847 ♪ And you will be happy too ♪ ♪ 1878 01:31:23,979 --> 01:31:28,232 COMPUTER: And may 100 percent of your Christmases be white. 1879 01:31:29,609 --> 01:31:31,610 (♪♪♪) 1880 01:32:54,110 --> 01:32:57,112 (JUSTIN BIEBER'S "SANTA CLAUS IS COMIN' TO TOWN" PLAYING) 1881 01:32:58,073 --> 01:32:59,365 ♪ Santa's comin', girl ♪ 1882 01:33:01,284 --> 01:33:03,035 ♪ Santa's comin' to town ♪ 1883 01:33:03,495 --> 01:33:06,330 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1884 01:33:06,706 --> 01:33:08,457 ♪ Yeah ♪ 1885 01:33:10,460 --> 01:33:12,002 ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 1886 01:33:12,712 --> 01:33:14,213 ♪ You better watch out ♪ 1887 01:33:15,006 --> 01:33:16,548 ♪ You better not cry ♪ 1888 01:33:17,467 --> 01:33:18,759 ♪ Better not pout ♪ 1889 01:33:19,344 --> 01:33:21,011 ♪ I'm telling you why ♪ 1890 01:33:21,930 --> 01:33:24,056 ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 1891 01:33:24,224 --> 01:33:25,683 ♪ Santa's comin' to town ♪ 1892 01:33:26,559 --> 01:33:30,437 ♪ He's making a list He's checking it twice ♪ 1893 01:33:30,981 --> 01:33:35,484 ♪ He's gonna find out Who's naughty and nice ♪ 1894 01:33:35,694 --> 01:33:37,736 ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 1895 01:33:37,904 --> 01:33:39,697 ♪ Santa's comin' to town ♪ 1896 01:33:40,115 --> 01:33:44,451 ♪ He sees you when you're sleeping He knows when you're awake ♪ 1897 01:33:44,619 --> 01:33:46,620 ♪ He knows when you've Been bad or good ♪ 1898 01:33:46,788 --> 01:33:48,831 ♪ So be good for goodness sake ♪ 1899 01:33:49,374 --> 01:33:51,333 ♪ You better watch out You better not cry ♪ 1900 01:33:51,626 --> 01:33:53,794 ♪ You better not pout I'm telling you why ♪ 1901 01:33:54,004 --> 01:33:56,088 ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 1902 01:33:56,256 --> 01:34:04,256 ♪ Santa's comin' to town ♪ 1903 01:34:07,684 --> 01:34:09,226 ♪ You better watch out ♪ 1904 01:34:09,978 --> 01:34:11,979 ♪ You better not cry ♪ 1905 01:34:12,314 --> 01:34:13,605 ♪ You better not pout ♪ 1906 01:34:14,232 --> 01:34:15,858 ♪ I'm telling you why ♪ 1907 01:34:16,818 --> 01:34:18,944 ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 1908 01:34:19,112 --> 01:34:20,821 ♪ Santa's comin' to town ♪ 1909 01:34:21,364 --> 01:34:23,157 ♪ He's making a list ♪ 1910 01:34:23,408 --> 01:34:24,950 ♪ And checking it twice ♪ 1911 01:34:26,036 --> 01:34:29,538 ♪ He's gonna find out Who's naughty and nice ♪ 1912 01:34:30,582 --> 01:34:32,750 ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 1913 01:34:32,917 --> 01:34:34,668 ♪ Santa's comin' to town ♪ 1914 01:34:34,919 --> 01:34:39,506 ♪ He sees you when you're sleeping He knows when you're awake ♪ 1915 01:34:39,674 --> 01:34:41,550 ♪ He knows when you've Been bad or good ♪ 1916 01:34:41,718 --> 01:34:43,802 ♪ So be good for goodness sake ♪ 1917 01:34:44,304 --> 01:34:46,305 ♪ You better watch out You better not cry ♪ 1918 01:34:46,473 --> 01:34:48,724 ♪ You better not pout I'm telling you why ♪ 1919 01:34:48,892 --> 01:34:51,018 ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 1920 01:34:51,186 --> 01:34:52,686 ♪ Santa's comin' to town ♪ 1921 01:34:54,939 --> 01:34:56,231 ♪ So it's that time of year ♪ 1922 01:34:57,067 --> 01:34:58,776 ♪ Where you let all your problems go ♪ 1923 01:35:00,153 --> 01:35:01,570 ♪ And, you know, you just ♪ 1924 01:35:02,614 --> 01:35:10,614 ♪ Shake it, shake it, baby Shake it, shake it, baby ♪ 1925 01:35:20,799 --> 01:35:24,843 ♪ He sees you when you're sleeping He knows when you're awake ♪ 1926 01:35:25,303 --> 01:35:27,304 ♪ He knows when you've Been bad or good ♪ 1927 01:35:27,472 --> 01:35:29,473 ♪ So be good for goodness sake ♪ 1928 01:35:30,058 --> 01:35:32,101 ♪ You better watch out You better not cry ♪ 1929 01:35:32,268 --> 01:35:34,311 ♪ You better not pout I'm telling you why ♪ 1930 01:35:34,646 --> 01:35:36,772 ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 1931 01:35:36,940 --> 01:35:38,440 ♪ Santa's comin' to town ♪ 1932 01:35:39,275 --> 01:35:41,318 ♪ He's making a list He's checking it twice ♪ 1933 01:35:41,486 --> 01:35:43,612 ♪ He's gonna find out Who's naughty and nice ♪ 1934 01:35:43,822 --> 01:35:51,245 ♪ Santa Claus is comin' ♪ 1935 01:35:51,413 --> 01:35:54,123 ♪ To town ♪ ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 1936 01:35:54,290 --> 01:35:58,460 ♪ Santa Claus is comin' to town ♪ 1937 01:35:58,628 --> 01:36:00,212 ♪ Santa's comin' to town ♪ ♪ 1938 01:36:05,635 --> 01:36:07,636 (♪♪♪) 1939 01:36:07,661 --> 01:36:09,661 (ENGLISH - US PSDH)131756